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» The Azure Heights Forum   » Onix Annex   » Arbok's Internet Cafe   » I'm gonna call ET the challenger, since it was on my turf.

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Author Topic: I'm gonna call ET the challenger, since it was on my turf.
TeeJay
Farting Nudist
Member # 265

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posted 02-24-2001 01:04 AM      Profile for TeeJay     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
In the uh, blue corner, we have the challenger, the national champion, the "Yo Snapz D00d," member of the 1337 d00dz, EeveeTrainer!

In the.... red corner, we have the uh, champion, uh yeah, the owner of PBS, high-ranking member of the well-known Overland Park Pokémon League, member of the ÜberPympz, TeeJay!

This battle was one for the books. It came down to the VERY end, luckier fighter wins. Props to ET, this battle did not deserve to be R1. And now...... the main event!

After having troubles with my computer, I drove over to Biffster's house to fight. That took about half an hour what with the figuring out what we should do, and the 5-10 minutes of driving and whatnot.

When the battle actually started, I had Alakazam, and ET had Chansey. Predicting a T-wave, I send out Rhydon. The wave stops at his feet. Chansey lets loose a NASTY Ice Beam, knocking Rhydon down to 39%. Rhydon in turn responds with a less-damaging Rock Slide, to 60%.

Rhydon goes out, Snorlax replaces him. ET, the clever bastard, T-waves Snorlax. Lapras replaces Chansey, and eats a paralyzing Body Slam. Snorlax Amnesias while Lapras is FP'ed. Lapras lets a Confuse Ray fly, and Snorlax hits himself and takes Blizzards and Body Slams til he can pymp no more. That was 5 turns, mind you.

6-5, ET

Good ol' Starmie pops out of his Poké Ball. Chansey replaces Lapras, but eats a CH Thunderbolt, taking Chansey from 60% to 41%. Starmie surfs Chansey to 25%, and Starmie is paralyzed. Chansey recovers while Starmie sits there FP'ed. Chansey uses a T=bolt, crippling Starmie to 55%, and Starmie responds with a Thunder Wave. Starmie Recovers, and ET, incorrectly predicting a switch, hits Starmie with a CH Ice Beam. Starmie at 77%.

I recall Starmie, and send out Zapdos, who I fed many treats to after the battle. Zapdos eats a CH Thunderbolt. Imagine, Starmie would have died, too! Zappy at 68%. Zapdos Light Screens, and Chansey is FP'ed. The situation is getting tenser. In response to the Snorlax incident, Chansey is FP'ed 3 turns in a row which leads to three fatal Drill Pecks.

5 all.

While ET takes 10 minutes to calculate all possible situations, the chat is abuzz. People are spitting out statements involving luck, skill, chanting, and taunts. ET sends out an Exeggutor. SC, Biffster, and I realize he has no ground types. We realize what he is going to do, too. But with Rhydon at 39%, there isn't a Pokemon that will survive. We sit back and pray for a CH Drill Peck. It doesn't come. Egger takes Zapdos down in a CH Explosion (I don't think the CH was required to kill), and before I realize what happened, it's

4 all.

With it all tied up, we are off to a fresh start. I send out Alakazam, and he sends out a Lapras, paralyzed at 74%. A Special Lowering Psychic drops Lapras to 44%, while Kazam spins around in confusion. Kazam regains control of himself, however, to launch a killer Psychic at Lapras, ending Lapras' previous luck streak.

4-3, TJ

Out comes Tauros. It's the classic battle between the Special and Physical powerhouses. Both are fully healed up. Tauros gets paralyzed, but so does Kazam, thanks to a Body Slam. Kazam at 46%.

I switch Alakazam out to Rhydon, who eats a Body Slam to 29%. After knocking Tauros to 61% with Earthquake, Rhydon falls to a counter-Earthquake.

3 all.

Carefully analyzing the possibilities, I send out Tauros. I had calculated Hyper Beam, and an average Hyper Beam would NOT have killed ET's 61% Tauros. Whether or not he knew this, he sent out Starmie, who eats a Body Slam and gets paralyzed to boot. Starmie at 67%.

Yet again, a Hyper Beam will not finish the job. Being overprotective of my Tauros's status, I switch to Alakazam, who is not affected by the T-wave. Alakazam uses Seismic Toss. Starmie uses Surf. Kazam at 17%. Mie at 36%. Both paralyzed. An FP'ed Kazam eats a Surf. An FP'ed Kazam sits and watches Starmie recover. An FP'ed Kazam bites the dust.

3-2, ET

I send out Starmie. My Mie: 77%. ET's Mie: 85%. Both paralyzed. You know what happens. We both choose T-bolt, and whoever pulls off two first, wins. Well, guess who got a CH T-bolt and went first...... me. I don't feel too good about beating his Starmie like that, mind you.

2 all.

It's heating up. It's winding down. Let's look at the current situation:

TeeJay:
Starmie (out): 77%, par
Tauros: 100%

EeveeTrainer:
Taruos: 61%, par
??????: 100%

Out comes his Tauros. Starmie Surfs. Tauros Body Slams. Starmie Surfs.

2-1, TJ

The Pokémon ET had kept hidden til the end comes out. What is it? Alakazam. Alakazam blasts Starmie with Psychic, Mie at 19%. Starmie paralyzes Kazam, setting up Tauros to finish it. Alakazam is FP'ed, so Starmie Recovers. Alakazam uses Reflect. Starmie Surfs. Kazam: 60%. Starmie: 69%

Zam recovers. Starmie Surfs. CH! Zam: 43%. Mie: 69%

Zam is FP'ed. Mie Surfs. Zam to 15%

Zam recovers. Mie Surfs. ZH! Zam to 10%

Zam is FP'ed. FINISH HIM! Mie Surfs. Fatality.

2-0, Your Champion, TeeJay of the ÜberPympz

The chat erupts into horrays and tears. I shake ET's hand, admit to being a lucky bastard, and sign off. Driving home it's raining hard. I get home, log onto FTP, and pull the log out of archives. The log can be found here.

In IRC chat, as I'm writing this, ET has gone officially insane. He is proclaiming to us all that we need to lead a life worth living, and Pokémon is holding us back. He sure is taking this hard. Massive props to him, wherever he may be right now. Props to Biffster, for letting me use his house to fight from and coaching. Props to StarCaliber for being a good coach. Props to all peeps in chat rooting for me. No Props to Biffster's brother, who was constantly annoying me and wanting me to play Mega Man X5 with him.

I look forward to R2, and the ÜberPympz road to victory!

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She wasn't quite my girlfriend, but we had sex and went to zoos together, which is all I really demand from a woman. -Mr. K

ICQ: 13724101
AIM: daBIGTom


From: Overland Park, Kansas, USA | Registered: Apr 2000  |  IP: Logged
Jumpman16
Farting Nudist
Member # 1089

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posted 02-24-2001 03:52 AM      Profile for Jumpman16   Author's Homepage   Email Jumpman16   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Damn...

I watched the whole battle thanks to view a battle...

...and was still in suspence while reading this war story.

Very well written, TJ.

Oh, and for all of you who haven't yet recognized, the ÜberPympz own you. You've been duly warned.

That is all.


From: Where they make Heinz® ketchup | Registered: Oct 2000  |  IP: Logged
starCaliber
is evil and also MewtwoSama
Member # 268

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posted 02-24-2001 10:39 AM      Profile for starCaliber   Email starCaliber   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Roger that, Jumpman.

Friggin' nice work, TeeJ.

Damn nice work.

P.S. I can get you into X-Trip.

------------------
"Ever see an elephant reach into the asshole of another, pull out a whole wad of poop, and eat it?"
- Mr. K, during a conversation about the Zoo


From: San Francisco, CA | Registered: Apr 2000  |  IP: Logged
EeveeTrainer
Farting Nudist
Member # 62

posted 02-24-2001 12:10 PM      Profile for EeveeTrainer   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
1) Why the hell did you surf my chansey like that with Starmie? o_O

2) You forgot to mention that CH that killed Zam. :P

3) Who the hell would think that a 40% paralyzed Starmie could beat single handedly a 100% perfect Zam? Only luck...

4) FEH! I could have taken that Tauros too ~_~

5) That CH tbolt was annoying on Starmie as well.

6) All those Confusion hits must have been annoying, I admit, but not near the 0.255% chance of getting those last CH's and FPs. ~_~

7) Oh, and quit wasting your lives, people. Go and be educated and do something productive.

8) Sporing Magikarp will rule the world!

~ET

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"Pikachu"
-Pikachu


From: New Hope, Pennsylvania | Registered: Feb 2000  |  IP: Logged
Annon
Farting Nudist
Member # 473

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posted 02-24-2001 12:37 PM      Profile for Annon     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Talk about a poor loser.

I find it humorous that ET thinks he's some Pokémon god because he won Nintendo's American Tournement. His team is the same standard crap every other John Doe uses. What makes him better then them? Nothing except luck. That's what it always boils down to in R/B/Y, since everyone plays the same damn teams. So it shouldn't be so shocking that the luck decided this battle, should it? Although I'd say the luck in this battle was almost even.

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Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged
TeeJay
Farting Nudist
Member # 265

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posted 02-24-2001 02:08 PM      Profile for TeeJay     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
ET: 1) Why the hell did you surf my chansey like that with Starmie? o_O

Because I don't take 5 minutes to think of my next move and made a mistake. Let's talk about the fact that you didn't bring any Grounders with you.

------------------
She wasn't quite my girlfriend, but we had sex and went to zoos together, which is all I really demand from a woman. -Mr. K

ICQ: 13724101
AIM: daBIGTom


From: Overland Park, Kansas, USA | Registered: Apr 2000  |  IP: Logged
Viktor
Farting Nudist
Member # 346

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posted 02-24-2001 02:50 PM      Profile for Viktor     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Annon:
Talk about a poor loser.

That's what it always boils down to in R/B/Y, since everyone plays the same damn teams.


I don't recall using a standard team since the IBT...

------------------
"And to think of all the time i wasted at Moe's"
"Wasted? What about our staring contests?"


From: Pennsylvania, USA | Registered: Apr 2000  |  IP: Logged
Kabutops
Farting Nudist
Member # 195

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posted 02-24-2001 03:13 PM      Profile for Kabutops     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
hahaha...some champion. annon-not everyone uses the same team. maybe everyone picks from the same 12, but they have their movesets and different balances. well meh. looks like theres a good chance ill be the captain of pojo...beware.

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Team Kabuchamp doesn't lose. It's that simple.


Registered: Mar 2000  |  IP: Logged
Ancient Egyptian Cat-Gonk
Happy Good Times Fortune Happiness Happity Hocks Cat-Gonk Happifier
Member # 14

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posted 02-25-2001 04:20 AM      Profile for Ancient Egyptian Cat-Gonk   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
YEEHAH.

God damn, I missed it...

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ÇÃt-gôÑk®: NÔvê·Va£¡Às·§TârR
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
¿Dº ¥õü ßè!iÈvë Ïn G¤dDìsh?
@iM: CatGonk | !rÇ: Tourmaline | I<Q: 83851495
tH3 K¡ttÝ l1Ttér þó)(: --[ http://catgonk.cjb.net ]--

":\ and ur supposed to be the mod around here?"
- Rune666, TPMer.


From: Perth, Western Australia. | Registered: Feb 2000  |  IP: Logged
Mr.E
Farting Nudist
Member # 696

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posted 02-25-2001 04:32 AM      Profile for Mr.E     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Let's talk about the fact that you didn't bring any Grounders with you.

That's what I discovered about Char411 and the reason I kicked his ass our third battle in the CLST...

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I AM A GOLDEN GOD!


From: Munchkin Land, Oz | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged
Squalldaman
Farting Nudist
Member # 691

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posted 02-25-2001 08:52 AM      Profile for Squalldaman   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Fuck ET. He is a little whiner who thinks he is a "Pokemaster" because he beat some idiotic newbie kids at a half assed tournament which more then 3 quarters of the best members on the Net couldnt even go to. Furthermore, when he loses, he makes a big deal about it and whines about how it was unfair and about how RBY is all based on luck. He tries to control other people's way of thinking, and acts like he is the captain, even though he is not. WHen he does lose, he tells us all of our lives are meaningless, even thoough he spends a hella lotta time of his on the Net playing Pokemon. As Annon said, ET is just the same standard using idiot with a hella lotta luck on his side. He has even a bigger ego then fucking DARRYN which is hard to believe. He thinks the whole world should bow down to him. I mean, most of the kids at the Nintendo contests where a bunch of sapsucking newbies that used Thunshocking Pikachus. Does it take skill to beat them? Nah....all it takes is the same standard crap that sucks ass.

Ive lost almost ANY respect I ever had for ET, since he is an egotistical bastard that should not be allowed to participate in ANY tourneys. BAH!

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Squalldaman
The Underused Pokemon Guy


From: Chicago,IL,USA | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged
starCaliber
is evil and also MewtwoSama
Member # 268

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posted 02-25-2001 09:13 AM      Profile for starCaliber   Email starCaliber   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
You know...even tho I never thought I'd say it...

I think I agree with Squalldaman.

Please, people. Hold your fire. ^_~

------------------
"Ever see an elephant reach into the asshole of another, pull out a whole wad of poop, and eat it?"
- Mr. K, during a conversation about the Zoo


From: San Francisco, CA | Registered: Apr 2000  |  IP: Logged
Squalldaman
Farting Nudist
Member # 691

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posted 02-25-2001 10:33 AM      Profile for Squalldaman   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Yes indeedy!

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Squalldaman
The Underused Pokemon Guy


From: Chicago,IL,USA | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged
SDShamshel
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Member # 791

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posted 02-25-2001 12:58 PM      Profile for SDShamshel   Email SDShamshel   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Of course there were Thundershocking Pikas in the beginning of the tourney. The 1st few rounds are designed to weed out the worst players. It isn't perfect, I have to admit that.

And the final battles in Australia were not filled with newbies, from what I've heard. It's not like all of the finalists were snot-nosed 5 year olds. In fact, the only finalist I heard that truly sucked was the one from Australia.

Though as for ET, he does handle losing badly. However, when you lose, you tend to notice what made you lose, and ET just stated all of the factors that contributed, aside from whatever Mad Skillz Teejay may possess.

------------------
"I think it's time I'll blow this scene, get everyone and their stuff together. Okay, 3, 2, 1, let's jam."
-From "Tank!"...the theme song to "Cowboy Bebop"

AIM: Nobie20
ICQ: 71976989


From: Tokyo-3 | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged
Charmeleon411
Farting Nudist
Member # 99

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posted 02-25-2001 04:00 PM      Profile for Charmeleon411     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Two things:

1. Mr. E, you're a dick, everybody knows it already.

2. Squalldaman is a dick. He's just copying argo's old flaming method of "I've lost ANY respect I once had for *insert person here*" get some originality bitch. And also, darryn ownz you squall. So die.

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"Yes, anyone who dares to disagree with Charmeloeon411 is an idiot..." - White Cat
MEH!
-Charmeleon411-


From: >_< | Registered: Mar 2000  |  IP: Logged
Eaichu250
Farting Nudist
Member # 826

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posted 02-25-2001 04:40 PM      Profile for Eaichu250   Email Eaichu250   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
*Prepares to say something*
*Changes his mind*
And.. Go KotRC..

------------------
Go Away.
Go. Now.
GO!


From: Perth Amboy, NJ | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged
Squalldaman
Farting Nudist
Member # 691

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posted 02-25-2001 06:29 PM      Profile for Squalldaman   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
1. I know Darryn ownz me.

2. I was never around for when Argo said that, I said that in an AIM chat I had with ET last night where he said some shit about us all being useless, and that all 1337 d00dz must use "Eevee, vaporeon, Flareon, Jolteon, Magikarp, and Mewtwo, otherwise the 1337 d00dz are out of the tourney." and other crap.

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Squalldaman
The Underused Pokemon Guy


From: Chicago,IL,USA | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged
Mr.E
Farting Nudist
Member # 696

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posted 02-25-2001 09:12 PM      Profile for Mr.E     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
1. Mr. E, you're a dick, everybody knows it already.

That still doesn't give you the right to stick your hairy-ass lips around me.

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I AM A GOLDEN GOD!


From: Munchkin Land, Oz | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged
SDShamshel
Farting Nudist
Member # 791

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posted 02-25-2001 11:03 PM      Profile for SDShamshel   Email SDShamshel   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Squalldaman, are you sure that wasn't his little brother you were talking to? ET's little brother has used his AIM account before.

------------------
"I think it's time I'll blow this scene, get everyone and their stuff together. Okay, 3, 2, 1, let's jam."
-From "Tank!"...the theme song to "Cowboy Bebop"

AIM: Nobie20
ICQ: 71976989


From: Tokyo-3 | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged
Charmeleon411
Farting Nudist
Member # 99

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posted 02-26-2001 06:21 AM      Profile for Charmeleon411     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Mr.E:

That still doesn't give you the right to stick your hairy-ass lips around me.


Awww, mr.e made a mass funny.


From: >_< | Registered: Mar 2000  |  IP: Logged


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