|
Author
|
Topic: Would you rather... (21 questions)
|
10,000Lb.Snorlax
loves long time.
Member # 13
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 11:02 AM
1. Be able to have sex with any woman (consensually) for the rest of your life or receive 1.5 million dollars?
2. Have a gorgeous body with sub-par penis (borked/small) or a sub-par body (fat) with a gorgeous penis (good size/shape)?
3. Never lose your hair and not get laid for the next two years or have sex with Britney Spears and Beyoncé whenever you want but eventually go bald (falcon can skip that question -- I know his answer already)?
4. Own a nuclear-powered submarine or the latest US fighter jet?
5. Work for Nintendo, Sega, Sony or Microsoft developing their next cutting-edge video game?
6. Have an/another older sibling or a younger sibling?
7. Be substantially happier or substantially more intelligent?
8. Have a lightsaber of your color choice or a hand held freeze ray which never runs out of ammo?
9. Live with Apes as an equal in a jungle paradise with a beautifully exotic woman or big king of a society of giant spiders in the harsh deserts of outer Mongolia?
10. Be able to see 10 minutes into the future whenever you want or know the name and location of the woman/man you should marry (be happiest with for the rest of your life)?
11. Fight a wild Orca in a 200,000 gallon tank with only an axe, or a lion in the african grasslands with a spear?
12. Be drafted into the US Army, Navy, or Air Force?
13. Get very good grades in school and play the tuba like a pro but have no friends, social interaction or be a D student all through your school years but be very popular?
14. Live with four girls as roommates or four guys?
15. Be the world's greatest pool player, dart player, or foosball player?
16. Be incredibly lucky for one year (20X current odds at winning) or for the rest of your life have "perfect timing" -- never be late nor early, always right place at right time, asking girl out on date perfect time etc.
17. Be able to breathe underwater or have the recipe for the most delicious entree the world has ever known?
18. The power to give any woman an orgasm at any time for the rest of your life or the power to locate buried treasure anywhere on the globe for only the next 5 years (after which time all information of un exhumed treasure is lost again forever)?
19. Have complete control over the making of your own hollywood movie (casting/production/length) as well as 150 million dollars to spend on it -- or write the most critically acclaimed book of 2003 but never be allowed to write another?
20. Appear on Jeopardy and finish with -200 dollars (after answering only one question) or get caught shop lifting DOA beach volleyball by your mother?
21. Kill three children while you are drunk driving and get arrested or play Russian Roulette with 2/6 chambers loaded?
![[Confused]](confused.gif)
From: Denver | Registered: Feb 2000
| IP: Logged
|
|
Gary Oak
Farting Nudist
Member # 1028
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 11:09 AM
1. Be able to have sex with any woman (consensually) for the rest of your life or receive 1.5 million dollars?
2. Have a gorgeous body with sub-par penis (borked/small) or a sub-par body (fat) with a gorgeous penis (good size/shape)?
3. Never lose your hair and not get laid for the next two years or have sex with Britney Spears and Beyoncé whenever you want but eventually go bald?
4. Own a nuclear-powered submarine or the latest US fighter jet?
5. Work for Nintendo, Sega, Sony or Microsoft developing their next cutting-edge video game?
6. Have an/another older sibling or a younger sibling?
7. Be substantially happier or substantially more intelligent?
8. Have a lightsaber of your color choice or a hand held freeze ray which never runs out of ammo?
9. Live with Apes as an equal in a jungle paradise with a beautifully exotic woman or big king of a society of giant spiders in the harsh deserts of outer Mongolia?
10. Be able to see 10 minutes into the future whenever you want or know the name and location of the woman/man you should marry (be happiest with for the rest of your life)?
11. Fight a wild Orca in a 200,000 gallon tank with only an axe, or a lion in the african grasslands with a spear?
12. Be drafted into the US Army, Navy, or Air Force?
13. Get very good grades in school and play the tuba like a pro but have no friends, social interaction or be a D student all through your school years but be very popular?
14. Live with four girls as roommates or four guys?
15. Be the world's greatest pool player, dart player, or foosball player?
16. Be incredibly lucky for one year (20X current odds at winning) or for the rest of your life have "perfect timing" -- never be late nor early, always right place at right time, asking girl out on date perfect time etc.
17. Be able to breathe underwater or have the recipe for the most delicious entree the world has ever known?
18. The power to give any woman an orgasm at any time for the rest of your life or the power to locate buried treasure anywhere on the globe for only the next 5 years (after which time all information of un exhumed treasure is lost again forever)?
19. Have complete control over the making of your own hollywood movie (casting/production/length) as well as 150 million dollars to spend on it -- or write the most critically acclaimed book of 2003 but never be allowed to write another?
20. Appear on Jeopardy and finish with -200 dollars (after answering only one question) or get caught shop lifting DOA beach volleyball by your mother?
21. Kill three children while you are drunk driving and get arrested or play Russian Roulette with 2/6 chambers loaded?
- - - - -
"You think it is done, you think all is well. Well kiss my green ass I shall see you in hell."
AIM: GRISH81
From: Roselle, Illinois | Registered: Oct 2000
| IP: Logged
|
|
undone-backwards
Farting Nudist
Member # 197
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 11:29 AM
1. Be able to have sex with any woman (consensually) for the rest of your life or receive 1.5 million dollars?
the sex
2. Have a gorgeous body with sub-par penis (borked/small) or a sub-par body (fat) with a gorgeous penis (good size/shape)?
big cock
3. Never lose your hair and not get laid for the next two years or have sex with Britney Spears and Beyoncé whenever you want but eventually go bald (falcon can skip that question -- I know his answer already)?
the sex
4. Own a nuclear-powered submarine or the latest US fighter jet?
jet
5. Work for Nintendo, Sega, Sony or Microsoft developing their next cutting-edge video game?
microsoft...they have the money
6. Have an/another older sibling or a younger sibling?
definitely younger
7. Be substantially happier or substantially more intelligent?
happier
8. Have a lightsaber of your color choice or a hand held freeze ray which never runs out of ammo?
feeze ray
9. Live with Apes as an equal in a jungle paradise with a beautifully exotic woman or big king of a society of giant spiders in the harsh deserts of outer Mongolia?
hmm...the women
10. Be able to see 10 minutes into the future whenever you want or know the name and location of the woman/man you should marry (be happiest with for the rest of your life)?
the marrying thing
11. Fight a wild Orca in a 200,000 gallon tank with only an axe, or a lion in the african grasslands with a spear?
easily the lion
12. Be drafted into the US Army, Navy, or Air Force?
none, I don't want to get shot in the back. Air force i guess...
13. Get very good grades in school and play the tuba like a pro but have no friends, social interaction or be a D student all through your school years but be very popular?
grades
14. Live with four girls as roommates or four guys?
how hot are the girls? generally guys tho, girls will get annoying after a while.
15. Be the world's greatest pool player, dart player, or foosball player?
pool..I'm so shit at pool.
16. Be incredibly lucky for one year (20X current odds at winning) or for the rest of your life have "perfect timing" -- never be late nor early, always right place at right time, asking girl out on date perfect time etc.
perfect timing
17. Be able to breathe underwater or have the recipe for the most delicious entree the world has ever known?
breathe
18. The power to give any woman an orgasm at any time for the rest of your life or the power to locate buried treasure anywhere on the globe for only the next 5 years (after which time all information of un exhumed treasure is lost again forever)?
orgasm...
19. Have complete control over the making of your own hollywood movie (casting/production/length) as well as 150 million dollars to spend on it -- or write the most critically acclaimed book of 2003 but never be allowed to write another?
movie
20. Appear on Jeopardy and finish with -200 dollars (after answering only one question) or get caught shop lifting DOA beach volleyball by your mother?
DOA
21. Kill three children while you are drunk driving and get arrested or play Russian Roulette with 2/6 chambers loaded?
roulette
From: under your bed... | Registered: Mar 2000
| IP: Logged
|
|
Land und Leute
HETEROSEXUAL
Member # 1040
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 12:32 PM
1. Be able to have sex with any woman (consensually) for the rest of your life or receive 1.5 million dollars?
I'd want the sex. These days, 1.5 million can't get you as far as it could a decade ago.
2. Have a gorgeous body with sub-par penis (borked/small) or a sub-par body (fat) with a gorgeous penis (good size/shape)?
I guess I want a gorgeous body. It won't matter what my penis looks like due to the above question and some questions after this one.
3. Never lose your hair and not get laid for the next two years or have sex with Britney Spears and Beyoncé whenever you want but eventually go bald (falcon can skip that question -- I know his answer already)?
I don't want to lose my hair! Wahhh! Besides, I didn't have sex until just recently, so two years isn't gonna matter much.
4. Own a nuclear-powered submarine or the latest US fighter jet?
I don't really need either. But I guess a jet would be nice.
5. Work for Nintendo, Sega, Sony or Microsoft developing their next cutting-edge video game?
I'd work for Microsoft but only because they have the money and the goods. However, I'll admit that I like all the others better than Microsoft.
6. Have an/another older sibling or a younger sibling?
Older please.
7. Be substantially happier or substantially more intelligent?
I need to be happier!
8. Have a lightsaber of your color choice or a hand held freeze ray which never runs out of ammo?
I'd want the freeze ray. Wahaha.
9. Live with Apes as an equal in a jungle paradise with a beautifully exotic woman or big king of a society of giant spiders in the harsh deserts of outer Mongolia?
I'd want to live in a paradise with apes and an exotic woman. Who would honestly want to be the king of spiders in a harsh desert? You could sic the spiders on people that you didn't like, but that's about it I guess. And then there's tha fact that you'll be in a desert, so the only person out there would be you. I'd feel kinda lonely after a while.
10. Be able to see 10 minutes into the future whenever you want or know the name and location of the woman/man you should marry (be happiest with for the rest of your life)?
I guess I'd like to see 10 minutes into the future. If I meet a girl, I'll just "check things out" every 10 minutes to make sure it'll all be cool. ^_^ Is that cheating?
11. Fight a wild Orca in a 200,000 gallon tank with only an axe, or a lion in the african grasslands with a spear?
I'd fight the lion. No way any of us will be able to take out or even outrun (outswim?) an orca underwater. Not like I'm saying we can outrun the lion. It's just that we are used to fighting on land, so we will be more skillful than if we were in the water.
12. Be drafted into the US Army, Navy, or Air Force?
Army. There are so many people in the army. Would they get around to using me?
13. Get very good grades in school and play the tuba like a pro but have no friends, social interaction or be a D student all through your school years but be very popular?
I'd want good grades and 1337 tuba playing powers. That'll actually get me somewhere in life later on.
14. Live with four girls as roommates or four guys?
Hmm... are the girls hot? No matter. Living with one girl would probably be hell in itself. I don't know about living with four. "OMG! Pick up those nasty socks! Hey, get off the phone! My boyfriend is gonna call me in three hours! OMG! Jessie, Amanda! Did you hear what happened to Dave and Lorna?! I heard from Ted that his sister Alexis saw Dave's friend Steve....." It might be kinda fun at first, but in the end, I'd rather have guys for roommates. *Burp* *Fart* "Hey, wanna play Mario?" "K." *Plays Mario for five hours.*
15. Be the world's greatest pool player, dart player, or foosball player?
I'd definitely want to be the greatest pool player. I've always wished that I was better in pool.
16. Be incredibly lucky for one year (20X current odds at winning) or for the rest of your life have "perfect timing" -- never be late nor early, always right place at right time, asking girl out on date perfect time etc.
My luck isn't that good in the first place, so 20 times the odds of winning stuff probably won't help me out that much. Except maybe in Yu-Gay-Oh.  Anyway, having perfect timing would be very useful. Not like I'd actually need it cause I'll be swingin' with apes and a hot girl while working for Microsoft and rooming with four guys.
17. Be able to breathe underwater or have the recipe for the most delicious entree the world has ever known?
Hmm... If I could breathe underwater, maybe I could take on that orca. But, naw, I'd rather make the most delicious entree. Mmm, mmm. I think I'll call it the Land und Lesbian Delite. ^_^ I'd have it served in top-notch restaurants, airlines, and schools of course. No more suffering! My apes friends will help me mass produce it while I do the hot exotic woman and make her orgasm. (See next question.)
18. The power to give any woman an orgasm at any time for the rest of your life or the power to locate buried treasure anywhere on the globe for only the next 5 years (after which time all information of un exhumed treasure is lost again forever)?
Orgasm, baby! I guess the only benefit to finding buried treasure would be the fame. I'd already be loaded with cash from my famous entree and I'm already famous for that in itself. Then, of course, I'll be famous for making all women orgasm... ![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
19. Have complete control over the making of your own hollywood movie (casting/production/length) as well as 150 million dollars to spend on it -- or write the most critically acclaimed book of 2003 but never be allowed to write another?
I'd definitely write the book. It only took Salinger one book to support him for the rest of his life.
20. Appear on Jeopardy and finish with -200 dollars (after answering only one question) or get caught shop lifting DOA beach volleyball by your mother?
Let's see: national humiliation or getting caught shoplifting by mommy. Hmm... that's a tough one. </sarcasm>
21. Kill three children while you are drunk driving and get arrested or play Russian Roulette with 2/6 chambers loaded?
Well, seeing as how I want to live (after all, I have the hot woman to get back to, my pool playing reputation, eating my delicious entree, etc.), I think I'll kill three children while DUI. Seeing how I'm famous and loaded and stuff, I'll be able to get off pretty easily with my team of lawyers and my reputation. Besides, the US Judicial system is b0rked anyway, so I'd probably only have to do rehab and time for a few months, any maybe pay a fine. The point is, I want to live.
EDIT: Typing too fast. Making stupd mistakes . ![[Embarrassed]](redface.gif)
[ 07-18-2003, 12:35 PM: Message edited by: Land und Leute ]
- - - - -
theclaw: I can't rate myself!!
Registered: Oct 2000
| IP: Logged
|
|
undone-backwards
Farting Nudist
Member # 197
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 01:07 PM
dude, I think the questions are separate.
From: under your bed... | Registered: Mar 2000
| IP: Logged
|
|
cfalcon
OLDNBLD
Member # 19
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 01:39 PM
1. Be able to have sex with any woman (consensually) for the rest of your life or receive 1.5 million dollars?
Well, one is an unachievable magic fantasy that not even the most desirable, intelligent, cunning man has ever has (or vice versa- even though a really hot girl could get into *most* pants, there are always plenty of exceptions), and the other is 1.5 million dollars, I'd clearly choose the first one.
I mean, it's just money. You can just earn it.
2. Have a gorgeous body with sub-par penis (borked/small) or a sub-par body (fat) with a gorgeous penis (good size/shape)?
The little-dick answer. I'm assuming you're magically stuck with the answer, but either way, penis length is remarkably not as important for about anything. Either way, if I had to choose between those two and the status quo, I'd stay just the way I am now.
3. Never lose your hair and not get laid for the next two years or have sex with Britney Spears and Beyoncé whenever you want but eventually go bald (falcon can skip that question -- I know his answer already)?
Thanks, fag-O-tron.
4. Own a nuclear-powered submarine or the latest US fighter jet?
Nuclear submarine. Unless there was some magical way that I wouldn't lose the fighter jet after flying it once or something.
5. Work for Nintendo, Sega, Sony or Microsoft developing their next cutting-edge video game?
This is hard. I'll throw out Sony because they mostly suck. Microsoft would be nice because they don't have a lot of bullshit restrictions on what you can and can't do, but I think I would go with Nintendo. I mean, I'm a fanboy.
6. Have an/another older sibling or a younger sibling?
Younger.
7. Be substantially happier or substantially more intelligent?
Well, if there was a dangerous, possibly addictive pill that definitely would increase my intelligence temporarily, I'd be all over that. There *ARE* dangerous, possibly addictive pills that increase happiness, and I've never touched them. Being happy is just a bunch of chemical reactions- being intelligent is the one different thing we offer.
8. Have a lightsaber of your color choice or a hand held freeze ray which never runs out of ammo?
Good question. Without additional Jedi style powers (ability to block bullets), I'd go with the freeze ray.
9. Live with Apes as an equal in a jungle paradise with a beautifully exotic woman or big king of a society of giant spiders in the harsh deserts of outer Mongolia?
Oh, spiders, easy.
Everyone hates spiders.
10. Be able to see 10 minutes into the future whenever you want or know the name and location of the woman/man you should marry (be happiest with for the rest of your life)?
I thought this was an AND question. If I can CHANGE the next ten minutes, then that one. If it's foreordained, and nothing can happen (in other words, I know every action up until that ten minute thing), then all I've done is erase 10 minutes from my life and sign up for a confusing vision. But again, this choice is only because the latter power is basically a one-shot deal, and I'll get pretty close on my own. Now if I could touch someone and know *their* "soulmate", and my own, then I'd go with that power.
11. Fight a wild Orca in a 200,000 gallon tank with only an axe, or a lion in the african grasslands with a spear?
Lion. Just cooler.
12. Be drafted into the US Army, Navy, or Air Force?
Air Force.
But they don't draft, I think just the army does. Correct me if I'm wrong.
13. Get very good grades in school and play the tuba like a pro but have no friends, social interaction or be a D student all through your school years but be very popular?
Couldn't say.
14. Live with four girls as roommates or four guys?
That question is too hard to answer.
15. Be the world's greatest pool player, dart player, or foosball player?
Well, football. You get the most money, and football is way more fun than those faggy games.
16. Be incredibly lucky for one year (20X current odds at winning) or for the rest of your life have "perfect timing" -- never be late nor early, always right place at right time, asking girl out on date perfect time etc.
Too hard to answer.
17. Be able to breathe underwater or have the recipe for the most delicious entree the world has ever known?
Magic power / minor marketed ability again. Clearly, since one makes you immune to a very viable form of death and lets you go places no one else can (and hell, I already have a nuclear sub)....
18. The power to give any woman an orgasm at any time for the rest of your life or the power to locate buried treasure anywhere on the globe for only the next 5 years (after which time all information of un exhumed treasure is lost again forever)?
Well, the one that doesn't expire.
Plus, that's a big male fantasy, and buried treasure is just so much junk.
19 and 20 are no fun.
21. Kill three children while you are drunk driving and get arrested or play Russian Roulette with 2/6 chambers loaded?
Hmm... lessee.... we can solve this mathematically:
(billions-3)/(billions) stil = billions.
(2/3)*cfalcon = possibly less than one of me.
So fuck the kids, I'll just go hide on the sub until the fever dies down.
Here's another:
22- Live forever or be truly happy for the rest of your natural life?
Hey, everyone above me picked "happier" over "smarter". This is paradoxical, given that you are actively spending time on the internet, and presumably desire to be happier over yet another mind intelligence increase. Get out more!
From: 39°45' N, 104°52' W | Registered: Feb 2000
| IP: Logged
|
|
undone-backwards
Farting Nudist
Member # 197
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 01:47 PM
quote:
Well, football. You get the most money, and football is way more fun than those faggy games.
foosball
From: under your bed... | Registered: Mar 2000
| IP: Logged
|
|
pkthunder
I look like your mom.
Member # 67
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 01:48 PM
1. Be able to have sex with any woman (consensually) for the rest of your life or receive 1.5 million dollars?
2. Have a gorgeous body with sub-par penis (borked/small) or a sub-par body (fat) with a gorgeous penis (good size/shape)?
uh...
3. Never lose your hair and not get laid for the next two years or have sex with Britney Spears and Beyoncé whenever you want but eventually go bald (falcon can skip that question -- I know his answer already)?
4. Own a nuclear-powered submarine or the latest US fighter jet?
5. Work for Nintendo, Sega, Sony or Microsoft developing their next cutting-edge video game?
6. Have an/another older sibling or a younger sibling?
7. Be substantially happier or substantially more intelligent?
8. Have a lightsaber of your color choice or a hand held freeze ray which never runs out of ammo?
9. Live with Apes as an equal in a jungle paradise with a beautifully exotic [MAN] or big king of a society of giant spiders in the harsh deserts of outer Mongolia?
10. Be able to see 10 minutes into the future whenever you want or know the name and location of the woman/man you should marry (be happiest with for the rest of your life)?
11. Fight a wild Orca in a 200,000 gallon tank with only an axe, or a lion in the african grasslands with a spear?
Though I would never hit the lion if I tried to throw the spear, I could at least set it to receive a charge.
12. Be drafted into the US Army, Navy, or Air Force?
13. Get very good grades in school and play the tuba like a pro but have no friends, social interaction or be a D student all through your school years but be very popular?
I don't really like the tuba, as an instrument.
14. Live with four girls as roommates or four guys?
Ooh.. tough one. Girls are so petty, but boys are messy. I'll go with the girls.
15. Be the world's greatest pool player, dart player, or foosball player?
16. Be incredibly lucky for one year (20X current odds at winning) or for the rest of your life have "perfect timing" -- never be late nor early, always right place at right time, asking girl out on date perfect time etc.
17. Be able to breathe underwater or have the recipe for the most delicious entree the world has ever known?
18. The power to give any woman an orgasm at any time for the rest of your life or the power to locate buried treasure anywhere on the globe for only the next 5 years (after which time all information of un exhumed treasure is lost again forever)?
This would prove funny in public places.
19. Have complete control over the making of your own hollywood movie (casting/production/length) as well as 150 million dollars to spend on it -- or write the most critically acclaimed book of 2003 but never be allowed to write another?
20. Appear on Jeopardy and finish with -200 dollars (after answering only one question) or get caught shop lifting DOA beach volleyball by your mother?
21. Kill three children while you are drunk driving and get arrested or play Russian Roulette with 2/6 chambers loaded?
From: Broomfield, CO | Registered: Feb 2000
| IP: Logged
|
|
Fenix
I live in a public bathroom.
Member # 2371
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 02:00 PM
1. Sex.
2. Big penis.
3. I'll lose my hair eventually anyways, won't I? Sex plz.
4. Nuclear sub.
5. Nintendo.
6. Younger sibling.
7. Ignorance is bliss.
8. Lightsaber, no contest.
9. Live with the apes.
10. See the future.
11. Lion with a spear.
12. Army.
13. Get good grades, but replace tuba with French horn ![[Cool]](cool.gif)
14. Four guys*.
15. Pool.
16. Be incredibly lucky.
17. Breathe underwater.
18. Treasure, the orgasm thing is covered.
19. Making my own movie.
20. Shoplifting.
21. Russian roulette. Might as well go with a bang.
*not gay
- - - - -
life of lively to live to life of full life thx to shield battery
From: The Homeworld, Aiur | Registered: Nov 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
MK
is somewhat large.
Member # 1445
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 03:34 PM
1. Be able to have sex with any woman (consensually) for the rest of your life or receive 1.5 million dollars?
Damn, any woman of my choice? I am SO tempted to take the woman, but I'll take the money... it'd pay for college and then I can get a good job and get my own women.
2. Have a gorgeous body with sub-par penis (borked/small) or a sub-par body (fat) with a gorgeous penis (good size/shape)?
Pass...
3. Never lose your hair and not get laid for the next two years or have sex with Britney Spears and Beyoncé whenever you want but eventually go bald (falcon can skip that question -- I know his answer already)?
Britney Spears
4. Own a nuclear-powered submarine or the latest US fighter jet?
Fighter Jet
5. Work for Nintendo, Sega, Sony or Microsoft developing their next cutting-edge video game?
Nintendo (duh)
6. Have an/another older sibling or a younger sibling?
Older, cause then they're gone
7. Be substantially happier or substantially more intelligent?
Intelligent
8. Have a lightsaber of your color choice or a hand held freeze ray which never runs out of ammo?
LightSaber
9. Live with Apes as an equal in a jungle paradise with a beautifully exotic woman or big king of a society of giant spiders in the harsh deserts of outer Mongolia?
Apes
10. Be able to see 10 minutes into the future whenever you want or know the name and location of the woman/man you should marry (be happiest with for the rest of your life)?
10 minutes into the future, VEGAS PEOPLE!
11. Fight a wild Orca in a 200,000 gallon tank with only an axe, or a lion in the african grasslands with a spear?
Lion
12. Be drafted into the US Army, Navy, or Air Force?
Air Force
13. Get very good grades in school and play the tuba like a pro but have no friends, social interaction or be a D student all through your school years but be very popular?
Good grades
14. Live with four girls as roommates or four guys?
Four girls
15. Be the world's greatest pool player, dart player, or foosball player?
Pool player
16. Be incredibly lucky for one year (20X current odds at winning) or for the rest of your life have "perfect timing" -- never be late nor early, always right place at right time, asking girl out on date perfect time etc.
Lucki
17. Be able to breathe underwater or have the recipe for the most delicious entree the world has ever known?
Breathe underwater
18. The power to give any woman an orgasm at any time for the rest of your life or the power to locate buried treasure anywhere on the globe for only the next 5 years (after which time all information of un exhumed treasure is lost again forever)?
Orgasm
19. Have complete control over the making of your own hollywood movie (casting/production/length) as well as 150 million dollars to spend on it -- or write the most critically acclaimed book of 2003 but never be allowed to write another?
Movie
20. Appear on Jeopardy and finish with -200 dollars (after answering only one question) or get caught shop lifting DOA beach volleyball by your mother?
Pass
21. Kill three children while you are drunk driving and get arrested or play Russian Roulette with 2/6 chambers loaded?
Pass
Registered: Jan 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
GenyaA310
Farting Nudist
Member # 3409
|
posted 07-18-2003 04:28 PM
1. Be able to have sex with any woman (consensually) for the rest of your life or receive 1.5 million dollars?
1.5 million
2. Have a gorgeous body with sub-par penis (borked/small) or a sub-par body (fat) with a gorgeous penis (good size/shape)?
gorgeous body w/ sp p
3. Never lose your hair and not get laid for the next two years or have sex with Britney Spears and Beyoncé whenever you want but eventually go bald (falcon can skip that question -- I know his answer already)?
never, ever lose my hair, ever
4. Own a nuclear-powered submarine or the latest US fighter jet?
US fighter jet
5. Work for Nintendo, Sega, Sony or Microsoft developing their next cutting-edge video game?
Nintendo
6. Have an/another older sibling or a younger sibling?
i have a young one, i like it better that way
7. Be substantially happier or substantially more intelligent?
more intelligent
8. Have a lightsaber of your color choice or a hand held freeze ray which never runs out of ammo?
lightsaber
9. Live with Apes as an equal in a jungle paradise with a beautifully exotic woman or big king of a society of giant spiders in the harsh deserts of outer Mongolia?
live with Apes
10. Be able to see 10 minutes into the future whenever you want or know the name and location of the woman/man you should marry (be happiest with for the rest of your life)?
10 minutes into the future
11. Fight a wild Orca in a 200,000 gallon tank with only an axe, or a lion in the african grasslands with a spear?
save the whales, harpoon an ld'r= the lion
12. Be drafted into the US Army, Navy, or Air Force?
Air Force
13. Get very good grades in school and play the tuba like a pro but have no friends, social interaction or be a D student all through your school years but be very popular?
hmm, well grr this is hard, good grades with tuba, but i already went through school better the way i did
14. Live with four girls as roommates or four guys?
hmm, 4 gorgeous girls, yes
15. Be the world's greatest pool player, dart player, or foosball player?
pool player
16. Be incredibly lucky for one year (20X current odds at winning) or for the rest of your life have "perfect timing" -- never be late nor early, always right place at right time, asking girl out on date perfect time etc.
have perfect timing
17. Be able to breathe underwater or have the recipe for the most delicious entree the world has ever known?
breathe underwater
18. The power to give any woman an orgasm at any time for the rest of your life or the power to locate buried treasure anywhere on the globe for only the next 5 years (after which time all information of un exhumed treasure is lost again forever)?
woman w. orgasm
19. Have complete control over the making of your own hollywood movie (casting/production/length) as well as 150 million dollars to spend on it -- or write the most critically acclaimed book of 2003 but never be allowed to write another?
complete control over movie
20. Appear on Jeopardy and finish with -200 dollars (after answering only one question) or get caught shop lifting DOA beach volleyball by your mother?
get caught shoplifting, definitely
21. Kill three children while you are drunk driving and get arrested or play Russian Roulette with 2/6 chambers loaded?
Russian Roulette
- - - - -
You and I have a rendevous with destiny. We can secure for ourselves this, the last best hope that man has to offer or the first steps into a thousand years of darkness. Ronald Reagan
From: Province of Wallachia | Registered: Jun 2003
| IP: Logged
|
|
Random Loser
Farting Nudist
Member # 1538
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 05:06 PM
1. Be able to have sex with any woman (consensually) for the rest of your life or receive 1.5 million dollars?
sex
2. Have a gorgeous body with sub-par penis (borked/small) or a sub-par body (fat) with a gorgeous penis (good size/shape)?
bod
3. Never lose your hair and not get laid for the next two years or have sex with Britney Spears and Beyoncé whenever you want but eventually go bald (falcon can skip that question -- I know his answer already)?
bald
4. Own a nuclear-powered submarine or the latest US fighter jet?
jet
5. Work for Nintendo, Sega, Sony or Microsoft developing their next cutting-edge video game?
sony
6. Have an/another older sibling or a younger sibling?
young
7. Be substantially happier or substantially more intelligent?
happy
8. Have a lightsaber of your color choice or a hand held freeze ray which never runs out of ammo?
erm...freeze
9. Live with Apes as an equal in a jungle paradise with a beautifully exotic woman or big king of a society of giant spiders in the harsh deserts of outer Mongolia?
woman
10. Be able to see 10 minutes into the future whenever you want or know the name and location of the woman/man you should marry (be happiest with for the rest of your life)?
woman
11. Fight a wild Orca in a 200,000 gallon tank with only an axe, or a lion in the african grasslands with a spear?
push... orca I guess, I thought the killer thing was more a myth...
12. Be drafted into the US Army, Navy, or Air Force?
AF
13. Get very good grades in school and play the tuba like a pro but have no friends, social interaction or be a D student all through your school years but be very popular?
push... screwed either way
14. Live with four girls as roommates or four guys?
erm, girls I think...
15. Be the world's greatest pool player, dart player, or foosball player?
pool
16. Be incredibly lucky for one year (20X current odds at winning) or for the rest of your life have "perfect timing" -- never be late nor early, always right place at right time, asking girl out on date perfect time etc.
timing
17. Be able to breathe underwater or have the recipe for the most delicious entree the world has ever known?
water
18. The power to give any woman an orgasm at any time for the rest of your life or the power to locate buried treasure anywhere on the globe for only the next 5 years (after which time all information of un exhumed treasure is lost again forever)?
orgasm
19. Have complete control over the making of your own hollywood movie (casting/production/length) as well as 150 million dollars to spend on it -- or write the most critically acclaimed book of 2003 but never be allowed to write another?
erm... movie I guess...
20. Appear on Jeopardy and finish with -200 dollars (after answering only one question) or get caught shop lifting DOA beach volleyball by your mother?
mum
21. Kill three children while you are drunk driving and get arrested or play Russian Roulette with 2/6 chambers loaded?
russian roulette
From: Uni of Virginny | Registered: Feb 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
cfalcon
OLDNBLD
Member # 19
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 06:12 PM
Ok, what would you rather have, a nice house, a really sweet car, and a good portfolio, or a superpower?
That's the "consensual sex versus 1.5 million" question.
Why? Why would anyone take the money?
And as far as the bald thing goes, you should reread the question: in the bald case, you end up with effective polygamy, and are bald. In the second case, it isn't the status quo + never go bald: it's never go bald + NO SEX FOR TWO YEARS.
NO SEX
Did you all miss that part?
So, let me get this straight, people who picked that option: if you *did* start to go bald, you'd definitely try that Propecia thing, even though it can cause impotence, right? I'm just making sure you're consistent in your genetically flawed thinking, here, is all.
I was talking with pk and I asked about the spiders versus apes thing. I asked her why she wouldn't want to be king of the spiders, and she said "Because I'm not a control freak like you."
Thanks. Cute, that.
From: 39°45' N, 104°52' W | Registered: Feb 2000
| IP: Logged
|
|
IceHawk78
NOBODY IMPORTANT
Member # 1699
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 06:38 PM
1. Be able to have sex with any woman (consensually) for the rest of your life or receive 1.5 million dollars?
It's like falcon said, with the superpower thing. Plus, I'm sure you could get some money using your superpower.
2. Have a gorgeous body with sub-par penis (borked/small) or a sub-par body (fat) with a gorgeous penis (good size/shape)?
Sub-par body can be much more easily fixed than a fucked up penis.
3. Never lose your hair and not get laid for the next two years or have sex with Britney Spears and Beyoncé whenever you want but eventually go bald (falcon can skip that question -- I know his answer already)?
Well, if the questions are interlaced, then I'ev already got the sex thing covered with my superpower. And if not, then I'm prolly not going to be having sex in the next 2 years anywas, so no biggie.
4. Own a nuclear-powered submarine or the latest US fighter jet?
The jet is gonna be a lot more useful than the submarine, although I'm thinking that a helicopter might work better.
5. Work for Nintendo, Sega, Sony or Microsoft developing their next cutting-edge video game?
I'd much rather let someone else develope it and just be their beta-tester.
6. Have an/another older sibling or a younger sibling?
I'm thinking older, but it depends on how much. If it isn't substancially older or younger, then I might go with younger. But probably older
7. Be substantially happier or substantially more intelligent?
Since I'm fairly certain that the accumulation of intelligence is my point on earth, it in and of itself would make me happy.
8. Have a lightsaber of your color choice or a hand held freeze ray which never runs out of ammo?
Freeze rays are a lot more likely to come ino existence before lightsabers or something equivalent will.
9. Live with Apes as an equal in a jungle paradise with a beautifully exotic woman or big king of a society of giant spiders in the harsh deserts of outer Mongolia?
Yeah, I've got no desire to be a ruler of anyone.
10. Be able to see 10 minutes into the future whenever you want or know the name and location of the woman/man you should marry (be happiest with for the rest of your life)?
Again like falcon said, that depends on whether or not you can alter aforementioned future. However, I'd much rather be able to freeze time or go back in time, so I suppose I'll just stick with my soulmate.
11. Fight a wild Orca in a 200,000 gallon tank with only an axe, or a lion in the african grasslands with a spear?
Orcas are beautiful creatures. I'd drop the axe, and just swim around until it ate me or until I'd be able to get out. Plus, sentinence is a great advantage that may keep it from hurting me (pipe dream).
12. Be drafted into the US Army, Navy, or Air Force?
My sight isn't 20/20, so I'd not be able to do anything other than be an air traffic controller though.
13. Get very good grades in school and play the tuba like a pro but have no friends, social interaction or be a D student all through your school years but be very popular?
I hate musical instruments, especially everything that has to do with the marching band. Popularity's overrated, but if it was changed to "has a small group of friends" then I'd probably pick that.
14. Live with four girls as roommates or four guys?
I'd like to just live in a house, with one girl as my roommate.
15. Be the world's greatest pool player, dart player, or foosball player?
My dart skills aren't bad now, but that would be the most useful. Just think - Darts can be used for things other than playing darts, and having the aim to handle them would be awesome.
16. Be incredibly lucky for one year (20X current odds at winning) or for the rest of your life have "perfect timing" -- never be late nor early, always right place at right time, asking girl out on date perfect time etc.
Timing is everything. Hell, with your perfect timing you could just go play slots and not need any luck at all.
17. Be able to breathe underwater or have the recipe for the most delicious entree the world has ever known?
Extreme scuba diving? I'll tap that shit.
18. The power to give any woman an orgasm at any time for the rest of your life or the power to locate buried treasure anywhere on the globe for only the next 5 years (after which time all information of un exhumed treasure is lost again forever)?
Buried treasure isn't that exciting to me.
19. Have complete control over the making of your own hollywood movie (casting/production/length) as well as 150 million dollars to spend on it -- or write the most critically acclaimed book of 2003 but never be allowed to write another?
There was no garauntee that your movie would be any good, and I suck at leadership thingies like that.
20. Appear on Jeopardy and finish with -200 dollars (after answering only one question) or get caught shop lifting DOA beach volleyball by your mother?
Oh, I'd answer more than one question, and I'd end up with something around $-10000. Celebrity Jeopardy, anyone? Tre-BECK!
21. Kill three children while you are drunk driving and get arrested or play Russian Roulette with 2/6 chambers loaded?
I'm not really sure why...
22. Live forever or be truly happy for the rest of your natural life?
I already talked about the "intelligence is why I'm here" thing, and infinite lives means that you can do basically anything, since you can't die, and while doing anything, I could find time to fit in my infinite intelligence quest.
[edit] Forgot the [/i] at the end of last comment.[/edit]
[ 07-18-2003, 06:39 PM: Message edited by: IceHawk78 ]
From: Ohio | Registered: Apr 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
Wintermute
My custom title sucks.
Member # 5
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 07:03 PM
If I can be forgiven a Thraxism:
WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU PEOPLE.
THEY'RE GIANT SPIDERS.
GIANT.
SPIDERS.
Ok, what would you rather have, a nice house, a really sweet car, and a good portfolio, or a superpower?
That's the "consensual sex versus 1.5 million" question.
Why? Why would anyone take the money?
1. The superpower is being the world's biggest slut.
2. The superpower is also really sad and lonely, when you think about it.
3. Most women (being a subset of "humans") are annoying to be around. So unless this "force any woman to have consensual sex" power involves removing their ability to speak or act freely, no thanks. And if it does, see #2 and consider the personality defects required to find that appealing.
4. How to put this. For some people the power would be like being able to conjure pretty Easter eggs. Really quite beautiful Easter eggs that sometimes make great omelets, but other times are bland or leathery. So anyway these people we're discussing can conjure these Easter eggs when they already have handy a very large fridge of free-range AAA large size eggs that make great omelets rather more consistently.
From: Winnipeg, Manitoba | Registered: Feb 2000
| IP: Logged
|
|
cfalcon
OLDNBLD
Member # 19
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 07:14 PM
1. The superpower is being the world's biggest slut.
It's still a superpower.
2. The superpower is also really sad and lonely, when you think about it.
Well, moreso than your standard superpowers, but it's still a superpower.
3. Most women (being a subset of "humans") are annoying to be around. So unless this "force any woman to have consensual sex" power involves removing their ability to speak or act freely, no thanks. And if it does, see #2 and consider the personality defects required to find that appealing.
Yea, then it would just be mental control of some sort. And if you didn't want to be around annoying women, you just wouldn't use the power. See? It's a superpower, so you pick it.
4. How to put this. For some people the power would be like being able to conjure pretty Easter eggs. Really quite beautiful Easter eggs that sometimes make great omelets, but other times are bland or leathery. So anyway these people we're discussing can conjure these Easter eggs when they already have handy a very large fridge of free-range AAA large size eggs that make great omelets rather more consistently.
Ok, yea, and if you have a wife or girlfriend or something, the entire issue is dead.
But it would still be something that only you could do, and it would still be utterly unexplainable. Lots of people have 1.5 million dollars. Many have it multiple times. But no one, anywhere, could claim to have that superpower.
Plus, wouldn't it be worth it to be with one girl and have her know absolutely, 100%, that you didn't settle one bit to be with her?
I'm telling you, you just take the superpower. The other one is just dollars.
- - - - -
Subject: Ninja and Opensource
From: 39°45' N, 104°52' W | Registered: Feb 2000
| IP: Logged
|
|
cfalcon
OLDNBLD
Member # 19
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 07:17 PM
Oh, I didn't get Wintermute's thraxism. Do you mean like, OF COURSE YOU CHOOSE TO RULE THE GIANT SPIDERS, or did you mean STOP PICKING GIANT SPIDERS YOU CRAZY FUCKS WHAT ON EARTH WOULD YOU DO ON A FRIDAY NIGHT HANG OUT IN A WEB?
Cause I realized it wasn't self evident.
From: 39°45' N, 104°52' W | Registered: Feb 2000
| IP: Logged
|
|
Donald
Bob the Builder
Member # 1551
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 07:37 PM
1. Be able to have sex with any woman (consensually) for the rest of your life or receive 1.5 million dollars?
I'll take the sex.
2. Have a gorgeous body with sub-par penis (borked/small) or a sub-par body (fat) with a gorgeous penis (good size/shape)?
The body, and look for a girl with no sense of size.
3. Never lose your hair and not get laid for the next two years or have sex with Britney Spears and Beyoncé whenever you want but eventually go bald (falcon can skip that question -- I know his answer already)?
Keep the hair. I've gone 18.9 years without sex, I think I can handle another 2.
4. Own a nuclear-powered submarine or the latest US fighter jet?
The fighter jet, more places to land.
5. Work for Nintendo, Sega, Sony or Microsoft developing their next cutting-edge video game?
Nintendo.
6. Have an/another older sibling or a younger sibling?
Older sibling. I hate kids.
7. Be substantially happier or substantially more intelligent?
Happier, it don't get much smarter than this. </bragging>
8. Have a lightsaber of your color choice or a hand held freeze ray which never runs out of ammo?
As a Star Wars geek, I must take the lightsabre.
9. Live with Apes as an equal in a jungle paradise with a beautifully exotic woman or big king of a society of giant spiders in the harsh deserts of outer Mongolia?
The apes. More potential for conversation.
10. Be able to see 10 minutes into the future whenever you want or know the name and location of the woman/man you should marry (be happiest with for the rest of your life)?
The location of the woman. I live for the moment *throws up a version 1 sign*
11. Fight a wild Orca in a 200,000 gallon tank with only an axe, or a lion in the african grasslands with a spear?
I trust my throwing arm more than my swimming skills. Gimme the lion.
12. Be drafted into the US Army, Navy, or Air Force?
It's a tradition in my family to be screwed by the military, so can I take the comedy "none of the above" on this one?
13. Get very good grades in school and play the tuba like a pro but have no friends, social interaction or be a D student all through your school years but be very popular?
Good grades will take you a lot farther in life than hanging around the popular kids. I'll take the grades.
14. Live with four girls as roommates or four guys?
Depends, which ones are the better gamers? *rimshot* I'd prefer to live with the guys.
15. Be the world's greatest pool player, dart player, or foosball player?
Darts. There's more money in it.
16. Be incredibly lucky for one year (20X current odds at winning) or for the rest of your life have "perfect timing" -- never be late nor early, always right place at right time, asking girl out on date perfect time etc.
The timing. 20 x crap = slightly less pungent crap.
17. Be able to breathe underwater or have the recipe for the most delicious entree the world has ever known?
The cooking talent.
18. The power to give any woman an orgasm at any time for the rest of your life or the power to locate buried treasure anywhere on the globe for only the next 5 years (after which time all information of un exhumed treasure is lost again forever)?
The treasure-finding ability. Money's a pretty powerful aphrodisiac.
19. Have complete control over the making of your own hollywood movie (casting/production/length) as well as 150 million dollars to spend on it -- or write the most critically acclaimed book of 2003 but never be allowed to write another?
The best-selling novel. Hey, it worked for Harper Lee (To Kill a Mockingbird), didn't it?
20. Appear on Jeopardy and finish with -200 dollars (after answering only one question) or get caught shop lifting DOA beach volleyball by your mother?
Getting caught shoplifting. None of my Jeopardy fantasies involve losing.
21. Kill three children while you are drunk driving and get arrested or play Russian Roulette with 2/6 chambers loaded?
Russian Roulette, it has a 67% chance of nothing happening.
![[Trash Bear]](graemlins/trashbear.gif)
From: In your girl's panties | Registered: Feb 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
cfalcon
OLDNBLD
Member # 19
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 08:15 PM
Actually, the more I think about it, the more I'm not sure about the last question. Because in the first case you have a 100% chance of having to live with killing three kids, but in the other you have a 100% chance not being aware of having killed anyone.
The question is also based on what you think happens in the afterlife, I would think.
Since I kept tossing that one back and forth during my walk, I've come to the conclusion that it's a strong question.
From: 39°45' N, 104°52' W | Registered: Feb 2000
| IP: Logged
|
|
Wintermute
My custom title sucks.
Member # 5
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 08:20 PM
Cause I realized it wasn't self evident.
IT IS. ARE YOU PEOPLE MEN OR LITTLE WEENIE PEOPLE. WHAT IS COOLER THAN A KINGDOM OF GIANT SPIDERS IN THE DESERT.
ARE.
YOU.
MEN.
And if you didn't want to be around annoying women, you just wouldn't use the power. See? It's a superpower, so you pick it.
Ok, ok. I'm a big believer in taking just about any superpower if offered. But this one is still gayer than a Christmas carol. If all you can do is have sex with the woman, how are you supposed to find out whether she is annoying? Go out on a few dates? Well fuck man, if its going so great then why not tap it the old fashioned way? What is this, the revenge against otherwise-great-but-sexually-frigid bitches power? Fuck having sex with them then, give me a superpower that lets me cause them pain at will. And how are we supposed to get near <insert supermodel with rock hard fake tits, an eating disorder, and a pharmacy in her purse> to exercise the power?
last minute edit: Subjectively, the Russian Roulette choice has a 100% chance of nothing happening.
From: Winnipeg, Manitoba | Registered: Feb 2000
| IP: Logged
|
|
cfalcon
OLDNBLD
Member # 19
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 08:25 PM
Well, you don't believe in an afterlife, so yea, you would think so.
I think it's obvious that believing in the hereafter and God makes it much more likely that you would want to kill the three small children.
Regardless, I've decided to change my answer on that one. With the roulette, I have a chance of nothing bad happening, and after some thought I realized that there is no WAY I would fuck that up and shoot myself. Puh-lease. If I thought that way, I would have a lot more insurance than I do now. Plus all the stuff about not wanting to kill innocent kids, but that's *always* been a consideration.
From: 39°45' N, 104°52' W | Registered: Feb 2000
| IP: Logged
|
|
mleo2003
Farting Nudist
Member # 1618
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 10:29 PM
1. Be able to have sex with any woman (consensually) for the rest of your life or receive 1.5 million dollars?
Sex
2. Have a gorgeous body with sub-par penis (borked/small) or a sub-par body (fat) with a gorgeous penis (good size/shape)?
Well, there's a pill for the first, and Slim Fast for the second, so either way
3. Never lose your hair and not get laid for the next two years or have sex with Britney Spears and Beyoncé whenever you want but eventually go bald (falcon can skip that question -- I know his answer already)?
Well, I haven't had any for the past 18 years, two more years won't kill me
4. Own a nuclear-powered submarine or the latest US fighter jet?
Jet, cause with the right missile, I could bomb underwater bases as well
5. Work for Nintendo, Sega, Sony or Microsoft developing their next cutting-edge video game?
Well, if the Nintendo job was to play-test all the new games before everyone else, that one. Otherwise, Microsoft so I could have the earliest software updates
6. Have an/another older sibling or a younger sibling?
Well, I already have one of each, and I'm going to College in the fall, so either one, cause I won't be around that much for either to bother/help me
7. Be substantially happier or substantially more intelligent?
Happy, cause I can read and become more intelligent
8. Have a lightsaber of your color choice or a hand held freeze ray which never runs out of ammo?
So long as it came with the bullet-block power, lightsaber. Otherwise, freeze ray.
9. Live with Apes as an equal in a jungle paradise with a beautifully exotic woman or big king of a society of giant spiders in the harsh deserts of outer Mongolia?
Apes. Definetely the apes.
10. Be able to see 10 minutes into the future whenever you want or know the name and location of the woman/man you should marry (be happiest with for the rest of your life)?
Woman I'd marry
11. Fight a wild Orca in a 200,000 gallon tank with only an axe, or a lion in the african grasslands with a spear?
Lion, cause I'd have at least a small chance versus it.
12. Be drafted into the US Army, Navy, or Air Force?
Air Force, cause I'd have my own jet to fly around
13. Get very good grades in school and play the tuba like a pro but have no friends, social interaction or be a D student all through your school years but be very popular?
The first option, but only because that was almost the way I ended high school this past year. Trade the tuba with a Trumpet, French Horn, or Baritone, and it would be even closer.
14. Live with four girls as roommates or four guys?
Four Girls of my choosing
15. Be the world's greatest pool player, dart player, or foosball player?
Pool, I don't know enough people that play the other two.
16. Be incredibly lucky for one year (20X current odds at winning) or for the rest of your life have "perfect timing" -- never be late nor early, always right place at right time, asking girl out on date perfect time etc.
Extra Luck, for number 21
17. Be able to breathe underwater or have the recipe for the most delicious entree the world has ever known?
Recipe for entree, I ain't fightin' no orca's
18. The power to give any woman an orgasm at any time for the rest of your life or the power to locate buried treasure anywhere on the globe for only the next 5 years (after which time all information of un exhumed treasure is lost again forever)?
Orgasm, for number 14
19. Have complete control over the making of your own hollywood movie (casting/production/length) as well as 150 million dollars to spend on it -- or write the most critically acclaimed book of 2003 but never be allowed to write another?
Book
20. Appear on Jeopardy and finish with -200 dollars (after answering only one question) or get caught shop lifting DOA beach volleyball by your mother?
Shoplifting the game
21. Kill three children while you are drunk driving and get arrested or play Russian Roulette with 2/6 chambers loaded?
Roulette, cause with my uber luck, I'd comeout on top
- - - - -
When life gives you lemons...
Throw them back!!!
From: Forest, Mississippi | Registered: Mar 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
AnnieKat
Suicidal Failure
Member # 3202
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-18-2003 11:00 PM
1. That's actually kind of difficult. I think I'd take the ability to shag the chicks, though, because then I could cuckold anyone who annoyed me. Well, and go nail CatGonk... he IS an Honorary Woman.
2. Can I just have a gorgeous body and NO penis?
3. I think Britney Spears probably has chlamydia or something. I like my hair, though. But on the other hand, 18+ years without puts me of the opinion that I want some. Right now. Still, I'm female... we don't go bald. I guess it's inapplicable.
4. Oh, the jet, definitely. I'd use it to commute to school.
5. Nintendo, definitely. Microsoft is gay, and they haven't put out any decent Console games besides Halo. And that's questionable.
6. Hmmm. I always wanted an older sibling...
7. I'm smart enough. Make me happy.
8. Lightsaber. It's just too cool.
9. Ooooh. Spiders.
10. I'll go for marital happiness.
11. Lion.
12. Air Force.
13. The TUBA? Other than that, give me good grades.
14. Guys are far less annoying than girls.
15. Pool. You can make money at pool.
16. Timing.
17. Breathe underwater.
18. Wow, I could have sex with women AND make them have earth-shattering orgasms. Awesome. The potential for public embarassment doesn't hurt, either.
19. Book. I prolly only have one book in me anyhow.
20. Shoplifting.
21. Um... do I get to pick the children?
- - - - -
aתּņĩềκẢ†~ nθW |’m @ r33| ķıťŧŷ
Anthrax, will you marry me?
From: Anthrax's Love Nest | Registered: Jan 2003
| IP: Logged
|
|
Mewtwo Master
Farting Nudist
Member # 2257
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-19-2003 12:02 AM
1. Sex
2. Body
3. Never go bald
4. Jet
5. Big N
6. I'd prefer to be an only child, but since that's not a choice, younger
7. For me, inteligence is happiness
8. Green lightsaber
9. Equal among apes
10. I'd wantto know my soulmate
11. Lion
12. "None of the above" not being an option, I'll pick Army.
13. I'd prefer either of those to failing and being unpopular, but grades are more important
14. Four guys
15. Pool player
16. Perfect timing
17. Breathe underwater
18. Give women orgasams
19. Movie
20. Jeopardy!
21. Drunk driving
- - - - -
Guys in the army should wear a helmets and codpieces, to protect both heads.
From: USA | Registered: Oct 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
Dark_Herakurosu
Farting Nudist
Member # 1677
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-19-2003 01:32 AM
3. Most women (being a subset of "humans") are annoying to be around. So unless this "force any woman to have consensual sex" power involves removing their ability to speak or act freely, no thanks. And if it does, see #2 and consider the personality defects required to find that appealing.
Woman: Why did you never call me back! Blah blah bitch bitch bitch
You: -wanna fsck?
W: Kay-o
1. Secks
2. Sub-par body. I couldn't give a shit, given my choice on question 1.
3. At the same time? Besides, I'm already going bald.
4. Jet. WTF would I do with a submarine?
5. Fucking Sega. nIghts 2 here I come
6. Older
7. Happier. I couldn't possibly get more intelligent.
8. ph33r t3h yellow lightsaber.
9. Apes don't spin giant webs. And they're smart enough not to inject gut-dissolving liquid into their master.
10. Future. Well, it depends on whether I can change what happens.
11. Lion. I can at least breathe in the grasslands.
12. No.
13. D's.
14. Girls. They're bitchy, but guys can be bitchy too.
15. Darts. So I can become a contract killer. B3w4r3 t3h poison darts.
16. Anything with odds I inherently suck at anyway, so I say timing.
17. Entree. What's the point of breathing underwater?
18. Two guesses, and one's not treasure. (Well, in a way..)
19. Movie. Think Texas Chainsaw Massacre meets The Matrix. Cheap and recordsetting!
20. Shoplifting. Happened already, except I didn't get caught.
21. The children. At least I'd live.
- - - - -
There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs, huge erections, and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.
Registered: Apr 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
Uiru
Sketch Molester
Member # 437
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-19-2003 01:51 AM
1. Be able to have sex with any woman (consensually) for the rest of your life or receive 1.5 million dollars?
On the one hand, with 1.5 mil (without taxes, I presume) you would be able to live quite comfortably without ever lifting a finger again.
On the other hand... mmm, women. And there's always the chance of finding a sugar mama.
2. Have a gorgeous body with sub-par penis (borked/small) or a sub-par body (fat) with a gorgeous penis (good size/shape)?
I think it's easier to trim down than to bulk up. But I would also prefer to keep my current configuration.
3. Never lose your hair and not get laid for the next two years or have sex with Britney Spears and Beyoncé whenever you want but eventually go bald (falcon can skip that question -- I know his answer already)?
I like my hair...!
4. Own a nuclear-powered submarine or the latest US fighter jet?
Submarine. I'd drive it through Venice.
5. Work for Nintendo, Sega, Sony or Microsoft developing their next cutting-edge video game?
Nintendo.
6. Have an/another older sibling or a younger sibling?
Younger, of the opposite gender. Little girls are tolerable. Little boys aren't.
7. Be substantially happier or substantially more intelligent?
Intelligence. I have an endless parade of women and a nuclear submarine. I'm pretty happy already.
8. Have a lightsaber of your color choice or a hand held freeze ray which never runs out of ammo?
The freeze ray is more practical, but lightsabers have the geek factor. And they make that cool sound.
9. Live with Apes as an equal in a jungle paradise with a beautifully exotic woman or big king of a society of giant spiders in the harsh deserts of outer Mongolia?
If Mongolia is where I think it is, exotic jungle woman. As long as the other apes know when to bugger off, which will be most of the time.
10. Be able to see 10 minutes into the future whenever you want or know the name and location of the woman/man you should marry (be happiest with for the rest of your life)?
The second one takes all the fun out of it. I'd take the first one, assuming that I don't have to watch the entire thing and can just get a quick status report regarding a single action (if I kick that girl's jerk boyfriend in the face, will she be impressed or not?).
11. Fight a wild Orca in a 200,000 gallon tank with only an axe, or a lion in the african grasslands with a spear?
You ever tried to swing a weapon underwater? Spear, all the way.
12. Be drafted into the US Army, Navy, or Air Force?
Which is the one with the lowest (ie. less than 30%) rate of friendly fire casualties?
13. Get very good grades in school and play the tuba like a pro but have no friends, social interaction or be a D student all through your school years but be very popular?
MAD TUBA POWERZ
Erm, I think my grades are good enough AND I have plenty of friends.
14. Live with four girls as roommates or four guys?
HELLO LOVE HINA
15. Be the world's greatest pool player, dart player, or foosball player?
Pool.
16. Be incredibly lucky for one year (20X current odds at winning) or for the rest of your life have "perfect timing" -- never be late nor early, always right place at right time, asking girl out on date perfect time etc.
I would love some perfect timing.
17. Be able to breathe underwater or have the recipe for the most delicious entree the world has ever known?
Girls like guys who can cook... but then, I already have enough women. And I like the thought of breathing underwater. Do you get to negate deep sea pressure issues too?
18. The power to give any woman an orgasm at any time for the rest of your life or the power to locate buried treasure anywhere on the globe for only the next 5 years (after which time all information of un exhumed treasure is lost again forever)?
Like, with my mind? That's no fun. Well, maybe it would be, if I got bored. And it'd be more useful than digging up junk.
19. Have complete control over the making of your own hollywood movie (casting/production/length) as well as 150 million dollars to spend on it -- or write the most critically acclaimed book of 2003 but never be allowed to write another?
Movie, lol. Based on the most critically acclaimed book of 2003. ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
20. Appear on Jeopardy and finish with -200 dollars (after answering only one question) or get caught shop lifting DOA beach volleyball by your mother?
Both are equally unlikely.
21. Kill three children while you are drunk driving and get arrested or play Russian Roulette with 2/6 chambers loaded?
Well, I don't drink, AND I'm not stupid. I guess this wouldn't happen either.
And there you have it.
~Uiru
- - - - -
TIDUDSOFIEIHUGHEXXXC: "maybe he will let you touch his blow up do"
AFRO NOOOOOOO!!!
From: the floating castle of Newfoundland | Registered: May 2000
| IP: Logged
|
|
Wintermute
My custom title sucks.
Member # 5
Member Rated:
|
posted 07-19-2003 02:22 AM
...but in the other you have a 100% chance not being aware of having killed anyone.
Whoops, you slipped that in while I was composing. (I had just seen Donald's post.)
From: Winnipeg, Manitoba | Registered: Feb 2000
| IP: Logged
|
|
|
UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!
Printer-friendly view of this topic