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Author
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Topic: I lost my virginity today.
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Boodabonzi
like a virgin
Member # 2958
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posted 04-26-2003 06:47 PM
we both know that's impossible
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OK, I know I'm probably not the nicest Pokemon Trainer when it comes to giving advice, and if I get flamed on this, it is probably well deserved. So here goes...
From: Hitchin - biggest little shanty town in all of England | Registered: Jul 2002
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Psybro
Half Psyduck. Half Slowbro. All cop.
Member # 290
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posted 04-26-2003 06:51 PM
If I get to 21 without a single kiss then I'll just put it down to being a horrible person.
From: Sheffield, South Yorkshire, UK | Registered: Apr 2000
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Land und Leute
HETEROSEXUAL
Member # 1040
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posted 04-26-2003 06:59 PM
Okay, we didn't really use the lube because we had to. We just wanted to play around. She produces more than enough natural lubricant, so I really didn't need the lube in the first place. Just trying things out, ya know.
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theclaw: I can't rate myself!!
Registered: Oct 2000
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Ferquin
Farting Nudist
Member # 3269
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posted 04-26-2003 07:01 PM
Then why mess with a good thing? I'm sure that roast beef tastes great without extra sauce.
Unless it's the kind from Arby's that is. I love that red ranch sauce.
Oh and just to clarify, I'm not making any allusions to period blood.
[ 04-26-2003, 07:02 PM: Message edited by: Ferquin ]
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Ferquin N.C. Root
The Ferquinarium
From: Renton, WA, USA | Registered: Feb 2003
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EspeonNidoking
warcraft 3
Member # 2028
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posted 04-26-2003 07:11 PM
lol you had thick glasses wtf?
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"Yeah, my pubic hair has dollar signs trimmed in it!
$$Bling Bling$$" ~Jman
From: Summit,New Jersey, Tampa, Fl, and Rindge, NH | Registered: Jul 2001
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Land und Leute
HETEROSEXUAL
Member # 1040
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posted 04-26-2003 07:34 PM
Fine, fine. Playing with lube when we in fact don't really need it was probably unnecessary. But oh well, at least I learned something and hopefully you guys learned something too.
And yes, I am nearsighted and I used to wear rather thick glasses.
Oh yeah, she said my pre-cum is salty. olol?
EDIT: Also, when I first ate her, she tasted really sweet. Now, she's flavorless, haha. ![[Frown]](frown.gif) Maybe I've just gotten used to the taste or something.
[ 04-26-2003, 07:35 PM: Message edited by: Land und Leute ]
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theclaw: I can't rate myself!!
Registered: Oct 2000
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Wintermute
My custom title sucks.
Member # 5
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posted 04-26-2003 07:34 PM
LuL: The shit dried up so incredibly quickly and just became some sticky stuff on our hands. We just had to keep using more and more for the lubiness to continue.
Most lubes like that are water-soluble, same with plain ol' KY. If you started to sweat, for example, it would again become slippery. Fighters of various types sometimes apply it before a match for that reason. Unlike vaseline or baby oil, the ref wouldn't detect anything beforehand.
If you're using it for sexplay you could just keep a damp cloth nearby and squeeze it occasionally. (A plant mister would be ideal but may spoil the mood.)
EDIT: Playing with lube when we in fact don't really need it was probably unnecessary.
What? Hell no, it makes for a bitchin' handjob.
[ 04-26-2003, 07:37 PM: Message edited by: Wintermute ]
From: Winnipeg, Manitoba | Registered: Feb 2000
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Land und Leute
HETEROSEXUAL
Member # 1040
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posted 04-26-2003 07:48 PM
Wintermute: What? Hell no, it makes for a bitchin' handjob.
Oh yeah. She seemed to enjoy that quite a lot. Me too. ![[Wink]](wink.gif) ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
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theclaw: I can't rate myself!!
Registered: Oct 2000
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Rolken
Vulcan
Member # 7
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posted 04-26-2003 08:56 PM
I'm not sure why blood turns brownish when it dries up in your bed. My guess is that it has something to do with the oxygen levels?
Actually, exposure to the atmosphere results in water vapor binding with the hemoglobin in blood, which assists in oxidizing Fe(II) to Fe(III) and forming methemoglobin; the change in electron structure alters the visible absorption spectrum such that it appears brown instead of blue or red.
i am not a nerd
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[insert sig here]
From: Provo, UT | Registered: Feb 2000
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Ferquin
Farting Nudist
Member # 3269
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posted 04-26-2003 09:02 PM
So basically, when the water vapor touches the hemoglobin in your blood, it causes the iron in the blood to rust, and that makes it brown, right?
I can dig it.
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Ferquin N.C. Root
The Ferquinarium
From: Renton, WA, USA | Registered: Feb 2003
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Rolken
Vulcan
Member # 7
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posted 04-26-2003 09:15 PM
Yeah, or that.
From: Provo, UT | Registered: Feb 2000
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The Muffin King
Farting Nudist
Member # 2240
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posted 04-26-2003 09:29 PM
Lol. I knew that, it's a pretty funny story why.
I had bloody nose one time, and some of it dripped into my bed, and it turned brown over time. The next day, I asked my science teacher during class, "I have some blood in my bed, and it turned brown. How come?" Only after I said it did I realize the significance of this question.
From that moment on, I became cool IRL.
[ 04-26-2003, 09:37 PM: Message edited by: The Muffin King ]
From: Maryland | Registered: Sep 2001
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Lark84
My skeleton is made of creamy nougat.
Member # 1186
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posted 04-27-2003 05:29 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Rolken:
Actually, exposure to the atmosphere results in water vapor binding with the hemoglobin in blood, which assists in oxidizing Fe(II) to Fe(III) and forming methemoglobin; the change in electron structure alters the visible absorption spectrum such that it appears brown instead of blue or red.
i told u he was hardcore
[edit:] That goes for the Muffin King too
ceoalex: I'm not ugly, (I don't think so. I have glasses, but they're not thick and they're frameless. Of course, growing long hair (which I'm doing right now) might make me look more like a nerd) and I don't think the "nerd thing" is holding me back either. In school, perhaps, but I've been to several camps and stuff where girls always thought I was fun, a nice person, etc. Some even said I was cute.
I'm just horrible with confesing my feelings for girls, mostly because I have no fucking clue as to how she will react, and what to do if she says no. I just don't have the guts to. Being a virgin doesn't help, either, since I imagine most girls my age have at least kissed someone.
I'd like to point out, however, that I am (as previously stated) not depressed or contemplating suicide.
[ 04-27-2003, 05:31 AM: Message edited by: Lark84 ]
Registered: Nov 2000
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Boodabonzi
like a virgin
Member # 2958
Member Rated:
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posted 04-27-2003 06:23 AM
Now that I think about it I could be okay.
One time after I fingered her no end of blood came out, she shit it because she wasn't on her period for like two weeks or something. I guess maybe two fingers was a bad idea after all.
Could that of broken her whatever it's called?
I'd really like to hold on to the memory that my first lay was also a virgin beforehand.
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OK, I know I'm probably not the nicest Pokemon Trainer when it comes to giving advice, and if I get flamed on this, it is probably well deserved. So here goes...
From: Hitchin - biggest little shanty town in all of England | Registered: Jul 2002
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Ikuse
Farting Nudist
Member # 3037
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posted 04-27-2003 06:29 AM
Ferquin: People tell me things like that all the time.
"I don't know how she will react."
I always tell them the same thing.
"She's not going to fucking stab your face because you love her. Just go tell her, man."
Keep on truckin'.
Security is an important thing to have when you're dealing with girls. I know, it's hard to express your feelings toward them, but if you don't then you will regret it later on in life.
From: In my pants. | Registered: Aug 2002
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Mr.E
Farting Nudist
Member # 696
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posted 04-27-2003 06:51 AM
I myself have decided that I will simply die alone as well. ;/ I don't know why I haven't simply decided to become a hermit and live in some random woods place where I control the rabid squirrels or whatnot, but oh well.
Also, we should change Land's Title to "HETEROSEXUAL MALE WINNER" now. Or something.
[ 04-27-2003, 06:52 AM: Message edited by: Mr.E ]
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MickHale18: nevermind, I'll pull out for a second
MickHale18: *pulls out finger*
From: Munchkin Land, Oz | Registered: Jul 2000
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Fluorine
SMELLY BUTT
Member # 2904
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posted 04-27-2003 12:19 PM
I'm 18 and haven't kissed any girl either. I don't know if it's by choice or not, though... the fact is that I've never loved anyone, I mean, never enough to justify risking to lose my dignity by approaching the girl. I would just think "hm, she looks nice", then just forget about her. I won't even bother talking to her if I don't have anything really important to say. In fact, if any girl approached me, even if she was really hot, I'd probably be really annoyed and reject her right away. That'd be hard, because I hate hurting other people's feelings, but it would be for the better.
See, I loathe any form of social relationship. It's amazing to see how little effort I do - "will you go to the prom?" - "I'll think about it" - "you have to pay next week if you want to go" - "lol, I'll think about it". Obviously, I never bother. I don't try to stay in contact with other people either. If they don't contact me, well, too bad, I don't care, lol.
I also grow tired of people very quickly. If I was to go out with a girl, I would probably want her to die the month after. My attention span and patience are awfully limited. Anyway, I'll see if I ever like a girl, then it might change, but as of now, we'd just end up hating each other's guts.
Registered: Jun 2002
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Ferquin
Farting Nudist
Member # 3269
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posted 04-27-2003 01:57 PM
I don't know. You guys are still pretty young. You've still got a chance. I'm well into my adult years and past my prime. It's pretty much too late for me. Yeah, I fear rejection and all that, but the way I see it, it's better to just avoid it all together. Too much trouble. I'd have a lot to lose if I gambled on such chances. Maybe I'm just way too conservative, but it's a fine way to avoid that kind of pain. And I'd hate to burden some poor woman with having to be with me when they can have much much better. I'd be robbing some other guy of their prospective affections.
Naw, I've done the math. It's all good. You can have all the women (or men if you're so inclined). That ain't my bag anymore. Being a bachelor is well-suited for my lifestyle.
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Ferquin N.C. Root
The Ferquinarium
From: Renton, WA, USA | Registered: Feb 2003
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Corrupt
Farting Nudist
Member # 2210
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posted 04-27-2003 01:59 PM
My girlfriend bled the first and second time... wtf ![[Confused]](confused.gif)
i guess i just have a really huge cock ![[Embarrassed]](redface.gif)
Registered: Sep 2001
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Gary Oak
Farting Nudist
Member # 1028
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posted 04-27-2003 02:54 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Fluorine:
"lol, I'll think about it".
That would be funny if someone actually said "lol" in a real life conversation.
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"You think it is done, you think all is well. Well kiss my green ass I shall see you in hell."
AIM: GRISH81
From: Roselle, Illinois | Registered: Oct 2000
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Ferquin
Farting Nudist
Member # 3269
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posted 04-27-2003 02:58 PM
No, actually, it'd be pretty gay.
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Ferquin N.C. Root
The Ferquinarium
From: Renton, WA, USA | Registered: Feb 2003
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Lark84
My skeleton is made of creamy nougat.
Member # 1186
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posted 04-27-2003 03:29 PM
I use "lol" in everyday conversation, but only with my 00ber g33k friends, and when I talk to myself. It goes quicker than faking a laugh.
Girl: (he's cute) Hey... You know what we had for homework?
Me: (omg she's talking 2 me stay kewl) Yes. Pages 13-16.
Girl: (I have to say something more... I want to get his attention) So, uh, you know what happened to me the other day?
Me: (wtf she likes me omg omg this might be it) No?
Girl: [insert short, funny story here]
Me: LOL
Girl: (what's wrong with this guy?) *leaves*
Me: WTF
Registered: Nov 2000
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Ferquin
Farting Nudist
Member # 3269
Member Rated:
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posted 04-27-2003 03:46 PM
Do you say "el-oh-el", or "lawl"?
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Ferquin N.C. Root
The Ferquinarium
From: Renton, WA, USA | Registered: Feb 2003
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Boodabonzi
like a virgin
Member # 2958
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posted 04-27-2003 04:25 PM
dubbyou-tee-eff
I say lol sometimes but most girls I know have msn and use "lol" like a whore online anyway and just think I'm taking the piss out of them in a kiddy/chummy way. And girls dig that shit.
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OK, I know I'm probably not the nicest Pokemon Trainer when it comes to giving advice, and if I get flamed on this, it is probably well deserved. So here goes...
From: Hitchin - biggest little shanty town in all of England | Registered: Jul 2002
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Land und Leute
HETEROSEXUAL
Member # 1040
Member Rated:
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posted 04-27-2003 09:06 PM
Ok, everyone here who's just like "omg im such a loser ill die alone w/o girlz," please stand up, stick your chest out, and say "I am a GREAT person" in a loud, thunderous voice. Seriously. Do it. Because you all are great in your own ways. Who said that you needed a girl or a guy to feel cool or complete or |337? No one. If I could, I would want to sit down with the people of the board, even if it was just for a minute, and just say "hi." So everyone here stop dissin' yourselves! It makes ::This Guy:: sad.
On another note, my girl sometimes says "dot dot dot" when she's talking. It's cute. Sometimes, I'm like "yeah... umm... sweatdrop." Ok, I'm a dork.
Also, thanks for the praise and stuff. I'm just glad I could share something with you all.
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theclaw: I can't rate myself!!
Registered: Oct 2000
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Mr.E
Farting Nudist
Member # 696
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posted 04-28-2003 01:14 AM
I am a GREAT person
But that doesn't mean anyone else really gives a shit or thinks the same way.
[ 04-28-2003, 01:15 AM: Message edited by: Mr.E ]
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MickHale18: nevermind, I'll pull out for a second
MickHale18: *pulls out finger*
From: Munchkin Land, Oz | Registered: Jul 2000
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Knight
Insulting title
Member # 1378
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posted 04-28-2003 08:15 AM
Double U double 0 t!
From: The farm. | Registered: Jan 2001
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Face
I invented cancer.
Member # 1916
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posted 04-28-2003 10:32 AM
Good job....or something.
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Weezing!
From: Hackensack, nj | Registered: Jun 2001
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Lark84
My skeleton is made of creamy nougat.
Member # 1186
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posted 04-28-2003 12:25 PM
Land, I'm not depressed or contemplating suicide or anything... I feel 1337 even though I have no girlfriend. Plus I am a gr347 person too.
Registered: Nov 2000
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White
STUPID POST --->
Member # 2346
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posted 04-28-2003 01:03 PM
Keep tellin' yourself that, champ.
Also I did not know bonzibuddy had sex before; somebody please page me to every other thread he's posted in.
From: England | Registered: Nov 2001
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AnnieKat
Suicidal Failure
Member # 3202
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posted 04-28-2003 01:05 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Lark84:
Land, I'm not depressed or contemplating suicide or anything... I feel 1337 even though I have no girlfriend. Plus I am a gr347 person too.
Good. Girlfriends are overrated. Mostly, we just whine and want your cash, so save your time and your money for better things. Like... Nintendo. ![[Smile]](smile.gif)
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aתּņĩềκẢ†~ nθW |’m @ r33| ķıťŧŷ
Anthrax, will you marry me?
From: Anthrax's Love Nest | Registered: Jan 2003
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Boodabonzi
like a virgin
Member # 2958
Member Rated:
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posted 04-28-2003 01:23 PM
quote:
Originally posted by White:
Keep tellin' yourself that, champ.
Also I did not know bonzibuddy had sex before; somebody please page me to every other thread he's posted in.
because trying and failing to get with 14yr olds is the coolest thing in the world to do is it champ?
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OK, I know I'm probably not the nicest Pokemon Trainer when it comes to giving advice, and if I get flamed on this, it is probably well deserved. So here goes...
From: Hitchin - biggest little shanty town in all of England | Registered: Jul 2002
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Psybro
Half Psyduck. Half Slowbro. All cop.
Member # 290
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posted 04-28-2003 02:04 PM
I say dot dot dot IRL too
Plus I know full well that the reason I don't have a girlfriend is because I'm too damn witty and clever for them all.
From: Sheffield, South Yorkshire, UK | Registered: Apr 2000
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Rolken
Vulcan
Member # 7
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posted 04-28-2003 02:08 PM
I read ya. Y'all don't know what it's like, having to live life as a smart dude.
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[insert sig here]
From: Provo, UT | Registered: Feb 2000
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Corrupt
Farting Nudist
Member # 2210
Member Rated:
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posted 04-28-2003 02:12 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Psybro:
Plus I know full well that the reason I don't have a girlfriend is because I'm too damn witty and clever for them all.
I sincerely hope u are kidding.
Registered: Sep 2001
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Psybro
Half Psyduck. Half Slowbro. All cop.
Member # 290
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posted 04-28-2003 02:21 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Corrupt:
quote:
Originally posted by Psybro:
Plus I know full well that the reason I don't have a girlfriend is because I'm too damn witty and clever for them all.
I sincerely hope u are kidding.
Jeez, Admiral Comprehension, you think so?!?
Also, Booda, I would consider trying and failing to get with a single 14-year-old on the same level as being rejected by a 14-year-old after going out with her for a week.
From: Sheffield, South Yorkshire, UK | Registered: Apr 2000
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Boodabonzi
like a virgin
Member # 2958
Member Rated:
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posted 04-28-2003 02:29 PM
dude I got my fingers wet, she pissed me off, I dumped her, also it was two weeks and I have a new 14 year old now
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OK, I know I'm probably not the nicest Pokemon Trainer when it comes to giving advice, and if I get flamed on this, it is probably well deserved. So here goes...
From: Hitchin - biggest little shanty town in all of England | Registered: Jul 2002
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Corrupt
Farting Nudist
Member # 2210
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posted 04-28-2003 02:34 PM
Then maybe he should stop chatting them up with nerdy jokes..... no offence
Registered: Sep 2001
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Psybro
Half Psyduck. Half Slowbro. All cop.
Member # 290
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posted 04-28-2003 03:12 PM
what
From: Sheffield, South Yorkshire, UK | Registered: Apr 2000
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NintendoLover
I'm much dumber in actuality than I pretend to be.
Member # 3138
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posted 04-28-2003 05:04 PM
Psybro I think you should back off. Corrupt is way above your level when it comes to girls. I thought you would have realized this by now.
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I love Nintendo!
Registered: Nov 2002
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137
Whiner
Member # 1465
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posted 04-28-2003 05:40 PM
Sounds like a thumbs-up is in order, Land, in conjunction with an awkward and indecipherable facial expression.
From: Space. Like, outer space. | Registered: Jan 2001
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Land und Leute
HETEROSEXUAL
Member # 1040
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posted 04-28-2003 06:23 PM
Hey, no need to bash each other here... plenty of that going on at Pojo already.
So anyway, my girl wants to try something new... light bondage. What do I mean by "light bondage?" I dunno, it's her words. Anyway, she seems to like the idea of having her arms and legs tied to her bedposts, while I fervently tease her with my tongue, hands, and other parts. She doesn't want to be hit or anything, she just finds very arousing the idea of being totally helpless while I do what I please. Hey, I like it too. So does anyone know anything about this "light bondage" stuff? Is there supposed to be special rope that I have to buy? Is there a way to tie the rope?
Geez, I wish handcuffs would be enough for her.
EDIT: Typos.
[ 04-28-2003, 09:34 PM: Message edited by: Land und Leute ]
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theclaw: I can't rate myself!!
Registered: Oct 2000
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pkthunder
I look like your mom.
Member # 67
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posted 04-28-2003 07:23 PM
Yeah, I used to think I was into "light bondage" too, before that stupid bitch-ass ice cold can of iced tea came along.
From: Broomfield, CO | Registered: Feb 2000
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Land und Leute
HETEROSEXUAL
Member # 1040
Member Rated:
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posted 04-28-2003 09:34 PM
quote:
Originally posted by pkthunder:
Yeah, I used to think I was into "light bondage" too, before that stupid bitch-ass ice cold can of iced tea came along.
Hmm... I like... I might try that.
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theclaw: I can't rate myself!!
Registered: Oct 2000
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Ferquin
Farting Nudist
Member # 3269
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posted 04-28-2003 09:59 PM
Gnyah... Whatever floats yer boat, dude. Bondage is just too weird. Just get with the sex instead of the erotic torture thing. Why make it painful? Goodness knows I don't wanna read stories of her defacating on you or nothin' like them wacky Germans do.
[ 04-28-2003, 10:02 PM: Message edited by: Ferquin ]
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Ferquin N.C. Root
The Ferquinarium
From: Renton, WA, USA | Registered: Feb 2003
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Land und Leute
HETEROSEXUAL
Member # 1040
Member Rated:
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posted 04-28-2003 10:17 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Ferquin:
Just get with the sex instead of the erotic torture thing. Why make it painful? Goodness knows I don't wanna read stories of her defacating on you or nothin' like them wacky Germans do.
I really don't want to make it physically painful for her. I mean I love her and I would never do that. No whips, chains, spinning sawblades, clubs, swords, or guns. That's just weird. I just wanna tease her. I mean, imagine this...
Imagine someone you totally want, going all over you... running their tongue all over you... rubbing against you in all the right places... up and down... front and back... all over the place... And then she (or he) would start going... first slowly, then gradually quicker... and quicker... and quicker... and just when you are about to..... she (or he) would stop... And tease you some more... And just when you were about to..... she would stop. And all this time, you were totally helpless to do anything about it. Wahaha.
And I hope she doesn't defecate on me. Ewwwww... ![[Mad]](mad.gif)
EDIT: Typo, again.
[ 04-28-2003, 10:20 PM: Message edited by: Land und Leute ]
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theclaw: I can't rate myself!!
Registered: Oct 2000
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AnnieKat
Suicidal Failure
Member # 3202
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posted 04-28-2003 10:19 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Land und Leute:
Also what is light bondage
Go for some Hermes scarves. Style++, d00d.
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aתּņĩềκẢ†~ nθW |’m @ r33| ķıťŧŷ
Anthrax, will you marry me?
From: Anthrax's Love Nest | Registered: Jan 2003
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starCaliber
is evil and also MewtwoSama
Member # 268
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posted 04-28-2003 10:23 PM
lolling
From: San Francisco, CA | Registered: Apr 2000
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BigCheese
Farting Nudist
Member # 1479
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posted 04-28-2003 11:28 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Land und Leute:
[QBI really don't want to make it physically painful for her. I mean I love her and I would never do that. No whips, chains, spinning sawblades, clubs, swords, or guns. That's just weird. I just wanna tease her. I mean, imagine this...
Imagine someone you totally want, going all over you... running their tongue all over you... rubbing against you in all the right places... up and down... front and back... all over the place... And then she (or he) would start going... first slowly, then gradually quicker... and quicker... and quicker... and just when you are about to..... she (or he) would stop... And tease you some more... And just when you were about to..... she would stop. And all this time, you were totally helpless to do anything about it. Wahaha.
And I hope she doesn't defecate on me. Ewwwww...
EDIT: Typo, again.[/QB]
OMG! *orgasms*
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I have a nice butt!
From: The land of milk and honey...and cheese | Registered: Jan 2001
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Cloud9x
Estelle Getty
Member # 2805
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posted 04-29-2003 03:31 AM
this calls for a bud light.
fuck i read this entire thread at 3 am
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[22:51] Y2Jesus: shut up japanese peopre
From: Kanadia eh? | Registered: Apr 2002
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