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Author
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Topic: Gays, faggots, homosexuals, fruits, and queers...
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Mr. K
Racist
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posted 04-15-2003 12:21 AM
pk, as Thrax pointed out, I just find it funny when people seem to think that they understand the rationale of all the special rules in the Bible, and then go about essentially making up their own religion based on their own personal interpretation of the rules...as if God's will really changes based on what you think he means.
From: Cinnabar Island | Registered: Feb 2000
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pkthunder
I look like your mom.
Member # 67
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posted 04-15-2003 12:21 PM
You don't know enough about my religious beliefs to direct Anthrax's or your own statement at me. And hey, at least I don't follow blindly other peoples' (and experts') opinions of what the Bible means. I believe religion is a personal thing, a relationship between me and God. And I believe He decides to speak to me through my individual interpretation of His Word, and through my religious mentor.
I'm not nitpicky about rules. That's cause I feel there's only one "rule" to follow. All others will follow in kind.
From: Broomfield, CO | Registered: Feb 2000
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Mr. K
Racist
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posted 04-16-2003 02:43 AM
pkthunder: And hey, at least I don't follow blindly other peoples' (and experts') opinions of what the Bible means.
That makes total sense, but I still think it's funny.
That's cause I feel there's only one "rule" to follow.
Do you mean "don't be gay" or the thing about not calling other users "faggot"?
[ 04-16-2003, 04:29 AM: Message edited by: Mr. K ]
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Lunair
Farting Nudist
Member # 681
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posted 04-16-2003 03:49 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Mr. K:
pk, as Thrax pointed out, I just find it funny when people seem to think that they understand the rationale of all the special rules in the Bible, and then go about essentially making up their own religion based on their own personal interpretation of the rules...as if God's will really changes based on what you think he means.
more like, mr k: "oh noes argh argh argh argh!" am i rite???
i mean hay u mene taht GOD duznt change becaze wat i think
?
r u a ditry commie atheirst bsatud more like mr NOT-KKK?!?!? ![[Mad]](mad.gif) 
i declare jihad on j00 that is liek somthig taht i forget but si godo to declaer on Pp.l woh disagr w/ me mr TRATOR TO JSEUS!!!!am i rite???!!!!!!!!
1!!
-Punair i mean Lunair hah ha h ha i dont noe waht the baleat key is 4!!!
From: United Union of Onions | Registered: Jul 2000
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Mr. K
Racist
Member # 2
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posted 04-16-2003 04:32 AM
Alrighty then.
From: Cinnabar Island | Registered: Feb 2000
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Dweedle
My hands and feet are mangos
Member # 1209
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posted 04-16-2003 11:25 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Lunair:
more like, mr k: "oh noes argh argh argh argh!" am i rite???
i mean hay u mene taht GOD duznt change becaze wat i think
?
r u a ditry commie atheirst bsatud more like mr NOT-KKK?!?!?
i declare jihad on j00 that is liek somthig taht i forget but si godo to declaer on Pp.l woh disagr w/ me mr TRATOR TO JSEUS!!!!am i rite???!!!!!!!!
1!!
-Punair i mean Lunair hah ha h ha i dont noe waht the baleat key is 4!!!
What the fuck was that all about
[ 04-16-2003, 11:27 AM: Message edited by: Dweedle ]
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the only way to get pass this will be to commit suicune
From: second of all, Quagmire's not really a bad guy! | Registered: Nov 2000
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Lunair
Farting Nudist
Member # 681
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posted 04-16-2003 03:03 PM
Woah, I actually did post that. Kids, don't drink and drive. And by 'drink and drive,' I mean 'post on AH when you're tired as all get out.'
Oh well -- I suppose that people here are big boys and girls, and can handle it when ol' Lun here goes a bit off the wall.
It was intended as humor, so I probably shoulda put  as the icon, but I dint. Which just goes to show.
As a side note, is this thread completely derailed by now?
Now fully rested and ready to rock,
-Lunair
And by 'rock' I mean 'CHECK IT OUT CHECK IT OUT CHECK IT OUT CHECK IT OUT!'
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"Pulling together is the aim of despotism and tyranny. Free men pull in all kinds of directions." Terry Pratchett, The Truth.
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ceoalex316
Time for the flaming leprosy party
Member # 338
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posted 04-16-2003 11:12 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Mr. K:
pk, as Thrax pointed out, I just find it funny when people seem to think that they understand the rationale of all the special rules in the Bible, and then go about essentially making up their own religion based on their own personal interpretation of the rules...as if God's will really changes based on what you think he means.
You don't see god interpreting the bible for you. So how are you supposed to know how to interpret the bible the way god wants it to be interpreted?
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Maximum Penetration Industries.
From: NYC | Registered: Apr 2000
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Rolken
Vulcan
Member # 7
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posted 04-17-2003 09:53 AM
Well, if He wants us to get a particular message from the Bible, it'd make sense to convey it in a way that's clearly understandable. It's a lot more effective to write a book saying "Pull that trigger and you're going to Hell" than to wave your arms and chant "As the pink monkey rises at the tipping point, so too will the Arc of Truth sever the cloud's tongue" and let the disciples scratch their heads in bewilderment.
He isn't really even saying that much, though. It's more just that, with five gazillion different interpretations of the Bible already out there, what is there about This One in particular that makes it so Divinely Inspired compared to all the rest?
From: Provo, UT | Registered: Feb 2000
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veloS
8=D~~O:
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posted 04-17-2003 10:24 AM
The bible is really clear. If you do A, B will happen. Clear as it can be. (I'm not talking about books like Daniel and Revelation etc)
It's just that assholes like the pope and stuff try to fuck us up by telling other things, different from what the Bible says (purgatory's a good example of something that isn't in the Bible).
Buy a KJV, read it, accept it. Don't try to be a smart ass by thinking that what is in that book, isn't meant litterally.
Thou shalt not kill. Fine. I won't.
God said that homosexuality is bad. He hates the sin, not the sinner. Read the book, for crying out loud! He never said that homosexuals will go to hell, because of that. He said they will, if they don't accept Jesus.
So that dude who said that God hates gays, is much more gay than the goatse man could ever be.
People at the GameFAQS boards always yell: "Read the damn FAQS before acting stupid and asking us where the fuck you can find Feebas!".
Same with the Bible. Don't try to be a smart ass, and just read the book, with an open mind, and without being biased.
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www.mightyrhapsody.com
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ceoalex316
Time for the flaming leprosy party
Member # 338
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posted 04-17-2003 11:54 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Rolken:
He isn't really even saying that much, though. It's more just that, with five gazillion different interpretations of the Bible already out there, what is there about This One in particular that makes it so Divinely Inspired compared to all the rest?
Good, that’s what I was saying. I just wanted to point out there is no clear way to interpret the bible unless god comes down and tells us WTF he was talking about. I would be surprised if he wrote that book on an acid trip.
quote:
Originally posted by veloS:
It's just that assholes like the pope and stuff try to fuck us up by telling other things, different from what the Bible says (purgatory's a good example of something that isn't in the Bible).
If the pope is wrong, then who the fuck are you going to trust to interpret the bible? Yourself?
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cfalcon
OLDNBLD
Member # 19
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posted 04-17-2003 01:11 PM
If the pope is wrong, then who the fuck are you going to trust to interpret the bible? Yourself?
It's called Protestantism, and yes.
Not that Velo'S post was very enlightened, because he just ranted against all the Catholics within reading range.
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Subject: Ninja and Opensource
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AnnieKat
Suicidal Failure
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posted 04-17-2003 01:14 PM
quote:
Originally posted by ceoalex316:
If the pope is wrong, then who the fuck are you going to trust to interpret the bible? Yourself?
Why would the Pope be any more right or wrong than any of us? He's only a man. Just because he wears a big hat and has a bunch of cardinals advising him doesn't mean that he's automatically right- I mean, come on, his Bishops covered up child abuse! The fact that someone is supposedly an "authority" doesn't mean anything.
Fact: Humans don't know everything.
Fact: The Pope is human.
Now, the fact that the Pope has spent his entire life studying all of this crap means that, yeah, he's got the educational background to make his guesses sound really good. But in the end, that's all anything is- guesses. Especially religion. We don't know ANYTHING.
Perhaps we need to quit saying that "Oh, the gays are going to Hell" or "God hates buttsex", because the truth is that we don't know. Yeah, some old book that's been translated about a million times SAYS it's bad, but I don't really think that the Bible is automatically more valuable than, say, the Farmer's Almanac. I've read the same book in French and English, and it was actually really different- and this is a book in modern languages. Translation from an ancient language? Over how many thousands of years (keep in mind that it wasn't even WRITTEN DOWN for a LONG TIME)? The original Word could have said ANYTHING!
Our results are only as good as our information. And our information is kinda scanty, badly translated, and OLD.
Aye. Just... aye. MEOW.
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aתּņĩềκẢ†~ nθW |’m @ r33| ķıťŧŷ
Anthrax, will you marry me?
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Dweedle
My hands and feet are mangos
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posted 04-17-2003 01:46 PM
quote:
Originally posted by veloS:
The bible is really clear. If you do A, B will happen. Clear as it can be. (I'm not talking about books like Daniel and Revelation etc)
It's just that assholes like the pope and stuff try to fuck us up by telling other things, different from what the Bible says (purgatory's a good example of something that isn't in the Bible).
Buy a KJV, read it, accept it. Don't try to be a smart ass by thinking that what is in that book, isn't meant litterally.
Thou shalt not kill. Fine. I won't.
God said that homosexuality is bad. He hates the sin, not the sinner. Read the book, for crying out loud! He never said that homosexuals will go to hell, because of that. He said they will, if they don't accept Jesus.
So that dude who said that God hates gays, is much more gay than the goatse man could ever be.
People at the GameFAQS boards always yell: "Read the damn FAQS before acting stupid and asking us where the fuck you can find Feebas!".
Same with the Bible. Don't try to be a smart ass, and just read the book, with an open mind, and without being biased.
Dude, the thing is that the Bible really isn't meant to be taken literally. Each person is supposed to have a different experience when reading it. If it were supposed to be taken literally, how do you explain Genesis, where people lived to be 900 years old? That is blatantly untrue. That is just one example; there are many more which I do not have time to delve into right now. Not many things are meant to be taken literally, but each story is going to have a meaning, and it is the meaning of the story that needs to be understood. And even at that, the meanings wil be different for every single person.
The Bible is like the US Constitution. The Constitution was written over 200 years ago. When it was written, there were people who tried to take everything in it at face value, like Thomas Jeffereson. When he became president, however, he found that he needed to look at it in a new light to be able to rule the country to the best of his abilities. Abraham Lincoln was yet another president that felt that he could not take the Constitution literally to do his job. Nowadays, our government is based off of different interpretations of the Constitution.
The Bible means what you want it to mean, it doesn't mean exactly what is down on the pages.
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the only way to get pass this will be to commit suicune
From: second of all, Quagmire's not really a bad guy! | Registered: Nov 2000
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Living on air bubbles
Frank Stallone
Member # 2089
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posted 04-17-2003 02:19 PM
It sure is easy being an athiest.
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Barrierd
I have a colony of shrimp living in my bladder
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posted 04-17-2003 02:45 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Living on air bubbles:
It sure is easy being an athiest.
Amen.
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Where are my bitches
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Face
I invented cancer.
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posted 04-17-2003 03:01 PM
Nice discussion, guys.
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Weezing!
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Anthrax
Ultimate Authoritative Power in the Universe
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posted 04-17-2003 04:09 PM
Where the hell does it say that the Bible isn't supposed to be taken literally? It was taken literally for thousands of years.
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She told The Associated Press she first realized her son was mentally ill in 1996 when he killed her oldest child, a 25-year-old woman who suffered from cerebral palsy, by beating her with a dumbbell.
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DarkLickitung
I AM FRIENDS WITH ZACK_COMRADE IRL
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posted 04-17-2003 06:21 PM
I have Jesus.
He's in my trunk.
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ceoalex316
Time for the flaming leprosy party
Member # 338
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posted 04-17-2003 08:06 PM
quote:
Originally posted by AnnieKat:
Why would the Pope be any more right or wrong than any of us? He's only a man. Just because he wears a big hat and has a bunch of cardinals advising him doesn't mean that he's automatically right- I mean, come on, his Bishops covered up child abuse! The fact that someone is supposedly an "authority" doesn't mean anything.
Fact: Humans don't know everything.
Fact: The Pope is human.
Then the Christian religion is just one big book club.
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Maximum Penetration Industries.
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Dweedle
My hands and feet are mangos
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posted 04-17-2003 09:47 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Anthrax:
Where the hell does it say that the Bible isn't supposed to be taken literally? It was taken literally for thousands of years.
It doesn't actually say it anywhere, but people have been interpreting it in different ways since it was created. It was never meant to be taken literally in the first place. More often then not, the authors of the Biblical stories were writing about events that had happened before their time (in the Old Testament, anyway), so how can we trust what they say to be the absolute truth? There are even certain events that have three separate accounts in three different books, and each one is different. Really, how are we supposed to take such things literally, in that case? Also, if the Bible were taken literally, we wouldn't have so many different views and interpretations about it. We also wouldn't have Christianity if the Bible were taken literally. And like I said before, it should mean something different to every person that reads it. The main purpose of the Bible is to teach lessons, not provide a bunch of facts and rules that are set in stone.
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the only way to get pass this will be to commit suicune
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VaporeonsHaze
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posted 04-17-2003 10:42 PM
The Bible blows. Its like going to buy a history book and finding one in which the first chapter states that Germany won WWII. Are you gonna take that book to study? Course not.. same thing with the Bible. Anyone who reads Genesis and doesn't think it is total crap is on crack. And another thing, how can you guys be a group when you all think of the rules differently..
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ceoalex316
Time for the flaming leprosy party
Member # 338
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posted 04-17-2003 10:52 PM
They are a group because they all worship the same book, one big happy book club.
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The Muffin King
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posted 04-17-2003 11:01 PM
Yeah, one big happy little boy molesting book club.
[ 04-17-2003, 11:13 PM: Message edited by: The Muffin King ]
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Fractyl
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posted 04-17-2003 11:47 PM
quote:
Originally posted by The Muffin King:
Yeah, one big happy little boy molesting book club.
First off, that's was catholic preists, not an entire sect of Christianity.
I'm not a religious person, I believe something happened to begin our existence. I'm not sure of who, what or why. I do believe in living a good life.
I believe the Bible is the long winded version of a simple sentence. Use your fucking common sense. Don't kill people, respect the elders, don't steal, you know basic stuff. It's not rocket science we're talking about here.
The Bible talks about living your life as best you can. It says Jesus died for your sins, so be grateful. It says God is the ultimate parent and will love you no matter how much you fuck up. Just like your parents, God will be disappointed from time to time, but the love is unconditional.
On a semi-joking note, because I know someone will be pissed at what I'm about to say. But as I wrote this something popped into my head. People say abortion is a sin. But when you read the Old Testament and the story of Noah's Ark, the floods could be seen as God's coathanger.
Please note the above was not totally serious, but I may use it next time I have a discussion with someone, just to get a reaction
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I pretty much agree with Fractyl. -- Porygone
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Mr. K
Racist
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posted 04-18-2003 04:55 AM
cowlix: So how are you supposed to know how to interpret the bible the way god wants it to be interpreted?
Well, if you're going to take anything in The Good Book seriously, I seems to me that you should take it all seriously.
So, if it says "no fags", well, then, alright, "no fags", but if it says something else that you personally don't agree with, it doesn't make sense to say that specifically that part isn't important.
It's either all important, or it's meaningless, because you don't know which parts to take seriously or not.
My point is that many people seem to be happy to take a lot of flaky references to homosexuality to heart, but then dismiss direct statements because they think they are "above them" or that they "don't count" any more.
I just think that's bogus.
I mean, OK, if you want to have a different interpretation of the meaning of an allegory or metaphor, that's fine, but if it says something explicitly, it doesn't make any sense to dismiss it just because you think you know better.
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AnnieKat
Suicidal Failure
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posted 04-18-2003 11:01 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Mr. K:
Well, if you're going to take anything in The Good Book seriously, I seems to me that you should take it all seriously.
Well, if we're going to take ANYTHING you say seriously, we should take it ALL seriously, right?
It's a book. It's old. It's been translated a zillion times. People have added random-ass stuff to it and probably left some important stuff out. Really, it's the oldest, worst-translated, most misunderstood self-help book in the world. Some of what it says makes some sense: I can definitely deal with not killing my neighbors or fucking people that are related to me. Other stuff it says... yeah, like I'm gonna sacrifice doves or something in the temple every month to regain ritual purity.
You CAN'T take everything that book says literally, and ignoring everything it says just because it says it would be equally stupid.
"Jesus loves you, but He still thinks you're an idiot."
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aתּņĩềκẢ†~ nθW |’m @ r33| ķıťŧŷ
Anthrax, will you marry me?
From: Anthrax's Love Nest | Registered: Jan 2003
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ceoalex316
Time for the flaming leprosy party
Member # 338
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posted 04-18-2003 11:38 AM
If you can't take it all seriously then it’s worthless really. If it was translated zillion times then its not really the same book that god meant for you to read. So how are you supposed to figure out what good wants you to do or not?
If it’s common sense, then we need no religions, everyone should just know right from wrong. The thing that separates each religion are the things you do so that god won't hate you, if you don't know exactly what god wants, how are you supposed to do what he wants?
Seriously if you don’t follow the bible word, then your admitting that it can lie. The fact that you choose to believe what you want from the bible is proof that you are no Christian.
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Maximum Penetration Industries.
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AnnieKat
Suicidal Failure
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posted 04-18-2003 12:45 PM
If it's common sense, then we need no religions, everyone should just know right from wrong.
Might I point out that "common sense" is far from common?
The thing that separates each religion are the things you do so that god won't hate you, if you don't know exactly what god wants, how are you supposed to do what he wants?
Therein lies the entire question. The answer is that we don't know, all we can do is take a good guess and cross our fingers really hard.
The fact that you choose to believe what you want from the Bible is proof that you are no Christian.
Who are you to judge who is and is not a Christian? What, I'm supposed to check my brain at the door the instant I set foot in a house of worship? How is it considered a good thing to believe something with no rational thought about the issue?
I believe that God exists. I don't know what God's goals are- I couldn't possibly understand even if I did. I am NOT saying to interpret the Bible any ol' way you like, I'm saying that taking it word for word is STUPID.
I don't think that makes me a "bad person" or that I'm automatically not a Christian because I'm capable of thought instead of slavish support. If God wanted us to be zombies, GOD WOULD HAVE MADE ZOMBIES.
[Moronic drivel deleted.]
[ 04-18-2003, 01:33 PM: Message edited by: Mr. K ]
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Rolken
Vulcan
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posted 04-18-2003 01:40 PM
In this post I condemn you all for imposing your hopelessly unilateral, opinionated perspectives on everyone else due to the obvious logical inconsistencies of your positions. I then proceed to present my own hopelessly unilateral, opinionated perspective, bash you all for not seeing its obvious validity, and refuse to take into account the mere possibility of a dissenting opinion because anyone who would hold that opinion is clearly stupid.
I thus end my post with a sweeping overgeneralized assertion of the way things really are.
Edit: And don't think that when I belittle your theology and attack your reasoning I'm implying that what you believe is wrong. I'm just presenting my opinion, after all.
[ 04-18-2003, 01:43 PM: Message edited by: Rolken ]
From: Provo, UT | Registered: Feb 2000
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Dweedle
My hands and feet are mangos
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posted 04-18-2003 01:43 PM
AnnieKat is pretty much hitting it right on the nose. I think when you people heard me say the word "interpret," you immediately took it much too far.
The fact that you choose to believe what you want from the bible is proof that you are no Christian.
Alex, there are many, many, many sects of Christians in the United States alone. THey all use the same Bible. How do you explain the different ways they interpret them? Each sect is different. But they all are very similar in the general beliefs they hold. And within each sect, there are still varying viewpoints. So are you saying there is only one right sect of Christians, and the others have false beliefs? I think not. Everyone is entitled to their own experience from reading the Bible, just like any other goddamned book.
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the only way to get pass this will be to commit suicune
From: second of all, Quagmire's not really a bad guy! | Registered: Nov 2000
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Anthrax
Ultimate Authoritative Power in the Universe
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posted 04-18-2003 03:51 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Dweedle:
Alex, there are many, many, many sects of Christians in the United States alone. THey all use the same Bible. How do you explain the different ways they interpret them? Each sect is different. But they all are very similar in the general beliefs they hold. And within each sect, there are still varying viewpoints. So are you saying there is only one right sect of Christians, and the others have false beliefs? I think not. Everyone is entitled to their own experience from reading the Bible, just like any other goddamned book.
Well, each religion thinks that they're the only correct one, so if religion was in any way not a bunch of crap, there would be only one right religion.
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She told The Associated Press she first realized her son was mentally ill in 1996 when he killed her oldest child, a 25-year-old woman who suffered from cerebral palsy, by beating her with a dumbbell.
From: Somebody put shit in my pants! | Registered: Apr 2000
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Slade_64
chipmunk pr0n author
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posted 04-18-2003 04:23 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Anthrax:
Well, each religion thinks that they're the only correct one, so if religion was in any way not a bunch of crap, there would be only one right religion.
In your own little world maybe but not in real life. So what your saying is everyones opinions are crap? Each one is different and they all believe that their own opinions are correct so essentially every single person in the world is full of shit by your logic.
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Bucket.
From: Funky Town Texas | Registered: Aug 2000
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cfalcon
OLDNBLD
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posted 04-18-2003 05:09 PM
Though I still have "tear into S64 on baldness topic" on my to do list, I'd like to offer a counter-opinion of Anthrax's post:
Going from "there are a bunch of religions that each think the other is wrong" to "therefore they're probably all wrong" is a logical fallacy. Isn't it just as likely to jump over to "everyone in the whole world is probably onto something, because they all come up with pretty similar things. One might be right and the others wrong, but doesn't it stand to reason that there is some kind of god(s), because everyone came to the conclusion independently?
I mean, religion is more widespread than math, right?
If you asked everyone what the number A is, and 95% of the world answered 1,2,3,4, or 5, why should your more "logical" guess be 867?
From: 39°45' N, 104°52' W | Registered: Feb 2000
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Anthrax
Ultimate Authoritative Power in the Universe
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posted 04-18-2003 07:07 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Slade_64:
essentially every single person in the world is full of shit by your logic.
Well, yeah. Well, not agnostics or atheists, but pretty much, yeah.
[ 04-18-2003, 07:08 PM: Message edited by: Anthrax ]
From: Somebody put shit in my pants! | Registered: Apr 2000
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Wintermute
My custom title sucks.
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posted 04-18-2003 07:42 PM
Going from "there are a bunch of religions that each think the other is wrong" to "therefore they're probably all wrong" is a logical fallacy.
No, it's a logical necessity. The reason they each think the other is wrong is because they're asserting different versions of facts about the world. They can't all be true.
Of course, each religion asserts a hell of a lot of things. Some are common among them, and some are true. But since as a whole they offer contradictory accounts of the world, the fact remains that most or all of them are wrong about a lot of key things.
One might be right and the others wrong, but doesn't it stand to reason that there is some kind of god(s), because everyone came to the conclusion independently?
Did you just write that? First of all, there's your informal logical fallacy right there. But you don't even need to be familiar with that bestiary to know it's a horrible argument. Millions of people across dozens of cultures, I'm sure, have come up with various versions of "the sun moves around the earth." Shit, they must be on to something, right?
And where the hell do you get "independently" anyway? What a joke.
I've got no serious problems with people believing that there's a god as part of their religion. Do what you want. But don't act like there's good evidence or a sound argument that god-as-a-supreme-being exists.
On second thought go ahead and try. Then everyone can see the arguments being eviscerated and maybe they'll be less inclined to believe. That works for me too.
From: Winnipeg, Manitoba | Registered: Feb 2000
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AnnieKat
Suicidal Failure
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posted 04-18-2003 10:21 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Rolken:
In this post I condemn you all for imposing your hopelessly unilateral, opinionated perspectives on everyone else due to the obvious logical inconsistencies of your positions. I then proceed to present my own hopelessly unilateral, opinionated perspective, bash you all for not seeing its obvious validity, and refuse to take into account the mere possibility of a dissenting opinion because anyone who would hold that opinion is clearly stupid.
I thus end my post with a sweeping overgeneralized assertion of the way things really are.
Edit: And don't think that when I belittle your theology and attack your reasoning I'm implying that what you believe is wrong. I'm just presenting my opinion, after all.
OH, GO SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS.
Hey guys this is Anthrax again. whoa that was pretty mean, anniekat. Anyways I think I'm just gonna hijack all of AnnieKat's posts from now on to talk about various things. Today I'm gonna talk about pirates.
Pirates lived in prehistoric times. They were the rulers of five of the seven seas, except for Blackbeard the Pirate who was ruler of all seven for a period of nine years. Pirates were invented by Alexander Graham Bell after he spilled coffee on his lap and his assistant Watson shot him in the head with a blunderbuss. The mixture of Bell's alien brain matter and coffee resulted in the creation of the being known as the pirate, or corsaira vulgaris. Pirates still exist today and can be found on every continent except Antarctica.
The most famous pirate of all time is Captain Morgan. Captain Morgan, or "Captainmorganbeard the pirate," was born in Liverpool in 1943. During the skiffle craze of the early fifties, he formed a band with his childhood friends Paul McCartney and George "Ringo" Harrison. They found their drummer, Pete Best, at the bottom of a box of Frosted Flakes. Captain Morgan and his Troubadors of Love toured Hamburg for two years. The tour stopped when Captain Morgan received a distress call from his home planet Mercury and was forced to wage war against his race's mortal enemy, the Batman. The Mercurians and Batman fought for twenty years, until finally Mercury was destroyed in a fiery explosion and became what is now known as the Asteroid Belt. Captain Morgan lost his left leg and left eye and right hand in this battle. He took to wearing hooks and patches and pegs.
In 1491 Captain Morgan beat up and skinned Christopher Columbus in a small alleyway. Captain Morgan then took to wearing the skin of Columbus as a suit and conviced Archduke Ferdinand to fund his voyage to the new world. Upon landing in Cuba, Captain Morgan claimed the land for Captain Morgan, and thus the country of Captain Morgan Town, USA, was founded. Today the ancient ruins of Captain Morgan Town, USA, are the only manmade structure that can still be seen from space.
Captain Morgan also invented the practice of burying treasure chests. He buried treasure chests everywhere he went, much like the American folk legend, Johnny Treasurechest. Although most pirates would later fill their treasure chests with treasure, Captain Morgan would fill his with deadly chlorine gas that would kill whoever opened them.
Captain Morgan finally died in 1867 fighting against the zombie cyborg Batman that was created by the pinko commie Russians during the Cold War. When he died he blew up in a fiery explosion and created what are now known as the Galapagos Islands. All creatures that live on those islands are descended from parasites found in Captain Morgan's worm-filled stomach.
[ 04-18-2003, 11:14 PM: Message edited by: Anthrax ]
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aתּņĩềκẢ†~ nθW |’m @ r33| ķıťŧŷ
Anthrax, will you marry me?
From: Anthrax's Love Nest | Registered: Jan 2003
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cfalcon
OLDNBLD
Member # 19
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posted 04-18-2003 10:32 PM
Ok, clearly my post wasn't phrased very well.
My point was that the arguement *for* atheism that goes "There's a lot of religions, they are all in opposition to each other, so it makes sense that there is no god" is flawed.
I wrote what I thought was similarly flawed logic pointing the other way: "There's a lot of religions, and they agree on some key points, so it makes sense that those key points are true".
I'm not, as you think, dead serious or anything. There's no real way to argue for a being that has no demonstratable effect or any method of testability. There's no way to disprove one, either, unless some belief of his is demonstratably false (in which case the believers usually just reinterpret).
No, it's a logical necessity. The reason they each think the other is wrong is because they're asserting different versions of facts about the world. They can't all be true.
Of course not. But they can't all be true doesn't yield none of them can be true, and that is a fallacy, right?
Did you just write that?
Not in the way *you* thought I wrote it. Actually, you and K haven't been cutting me much slack here recently: if I give the counter arguement (this one was going to go into the "in defense of creationism" thread at some point, because no one had any kind of defense, and I wanted to see what I could do), you assume that's where I stand. While I *am* Christian, I don't believe there's any logical basis for it at all (well, besides being raised Christian, and that's not what we're talking about here).
And where the hell do you get "independently" anyway? What a joke.
I actually don't follow this. You aren't denying what I meant, which was that everybody around the world had religion pretty much forever. Whether your religion is organized or not, "primitive" or "civilized", shit tons of people came up with beliefs, presumably on their own. Unless you believe that whatever group humantity came from had some belief, and it's just been diluted over time.
I think the classical counter to this is "People are looking for answers", the newer one being "People have a thing in their heads that makes them want to believe in gods", and I've even heard "People are the only creatures that know they are going to die and understand it their whole lives. Other animals don't really realize it until it's about to happen, and religion is one of many defense mechanisms to this."
But don't act like there's good evidence or a sound argument that god-as-a-supreme-being exists.
Yea, I didn't really mean to imply that. But there isn't a sound arguement *against* a supreme being either (except for the standard policy against believing in invisible things that have no scientific merit), or at least, this isn't it.
From: 39°45' N, 104°52' W | Registered: Feb 2000
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J Man Cool
Farting Nudist
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posted 04-18-2003 10:42 PM
this is a hallmark moment.
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bagels
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NintendoLover
I'm much dumber in actuality than I pretend to be.
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posted 04-18-2003 11:43 PM
Does God hate gay people. Also, what is athiest.
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I love Nintendo!
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cfalcon
OLDNBLD
Member # 19
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posted 04-18-2003 11:58 PM
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Subject: Ninja and Opensource
From: 39°45' N, 104°52' W | Registered: Feb 2000
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EspeonNidoking
warcraft 3
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posted 04-19-2003 01:05 AM
anthrax fucking knows how to use the internet!
excellent work, and i lol'd.
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"Yeah, my pubic hair has dollar signs trimmed in it!
$$Bling Bling$$" ~Jman
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ceoalex316
Time for the flaming leprosy party
Member # 338
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posted 04-19-2003 01:08 AM
Right now AnnieKat is the only one that can get away with calling people names, what’s she so fucking upset about?
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Maximum Penetration Industries.
From: NYC | Registered: Apr 2000
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EspeonNidoking
warcraft 3
Member # 2028
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posted 04-19-2003 02:05 AM
quote:
Originally posted by ceoalex316:
Right now AnnieKat is the only one that can get away with calling people names, what’s she so fucking upset about?
you got away with it more than she has.
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"Yeah, my pubic hair has dollar signs trimmed in it!
$$Bling Bling$$" ~Jman
From: Summit,New Jersey, Tampa, Fl, and Rindge, NH | Registered: Jul 2001
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Slade_64
chipmunk pr0n author
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posted 04-19-2003 03:24 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Anthrax:
Well, yeah. Well, not agnostics or atheists, but pretty much, yeah.
K, just checking.
Oh and by the way, ![[This Guy]](graemlins/thisguy.jpg) .
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Bucket.
From: Funky Town Texas | Registered: Aug 2000
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Rolken
Vulcan
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posted 04-19-2003 09:50 AM
quote:
Originally posted by ceoalex316:
Right now AnnieKat is the only one that can get away with calling people names, what's she so fucking upset about?
She thinks my post was solely directed at her, when it applied to you and Dweedle as well.
From: Provo, UT | Registered: Feb 2000
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ceoalex316
Time for the flaming leprosy party
Member # 338
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posted 04-19-2003 11:53 AM
quote:
Originally posted by EspeonNidoking:
quote:
Originally posted by ceoalex316:
Right now AnnieKat is the only one that can get away with calling people names, what’s she so fucking upset about?
you got away with it more than she has.
Nope, I got temp-banned, you just didn't notice.
From: NYC | Registered: Apr 2000
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Wintermute
My custom title sucks.
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posted 04-19-2003 02:27 PM
But they can't all be true doesn't yield none of them can be true, and that is a fallacy, right?
As far as I can see. I don't recall anyone putting forth that argument, though. But maybe someone did. (Well, in my post I did say "most or all of them," but I meant the "or all" parenthetically. Like, that's by no means entailed, but it's still a possibility.)
Not in the way *you* thought I wrote it.
"but doesn't it stand to reason that there is some kind of god..." is kind of the way I thought you wrote it.
Actually, you and K haven't been cutting me much slack here recently
A major reason I haven't been posting is that lately I only want to in order to say something mean. It's ugly and stupid. But for such a smart guy (and frankly, for someone who carries himself as such a smart guy) you've posted a few incredible head-clappers within recollection. I guess partly it's that I think you should know better. Also of course there's a silly ego thing about it, which I loathe and which feeds back into the meanness.
you assume that's where I stand
Fair enough. I'm acting as though any Christian advancing pro-religious arguments must think they're sound.
Re: the "independently?" issue, I just think that many of the worlds religions have borrowed from each other, or been directly derived, so that even in the macro-sense they aren't really independent. And in the micro-sense, you said yourself that you're a Christian because that's how you were raised. I think that's pretty common.
But there isn't a sound arguement *against* a supreme being either
Yes, but that's not an interesting track record for something that's unfalsifiable, which many accounts of supreme beings are. "The Lord works in mysterious ways" is practically an admission of this. Have faith, brother.
Also holy crap Anthrax.
[ 04-19-2003, 02:30 PM: Message edited by: Wintermute ]
From: Winnipeg, Manitoba | Registered: Feb 2000
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Lunair
Farting Nudist
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posted 04-19-2003 04:57 PM
NintendoLover: "Does God hate gay people."
If you're talking about the most prevalent god, the the answer to your question* is the same as the answer to this: "Does the large, strong bipedal humanoid with an orange rock-like skin and blue Speedos in my kitchen hate gay people."
See also begging the question.
"Also, what is athiest."
Well, the definition of thy is "adj. The possessive form of thou.
Used as a modifier before a noun."
Positively, this means that if something is yours (or thine), it is "thy thing." Comparatively, if something is more yours than something else, it is thier (pronounced "thy-er").
Superlatively, if something is the most yours of everything, then it is thiest (pronounced "thy-est").
And negatively, tack the prefix a- onto thiest to get athiest. The possessive adjective athiest actually has two meanings: 1. "not most yours," e.g. everything but the thing that is thiest, and 2. "most not yours," e.g. the thing that is, more than anything else, not possessed by you.
Always glad to be of service!
-Lunair
*I'm actually only guessing that this is a question, because nothing besides the tone indicates a direct question, and the sentence structure precludes an indirect question. So hopefully that was a question. If it was not, please contact me immediately through the phone number 9 (110) 044-4567, or email me at strongbad@homestarrunner.com**.
**uh, this is my real email. Don't question it, just send it!
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"Pulling together is the aim of despotism and tyranny. Free men pull in all kinds of directions." Terry Pratchett, The Truth.
From: United Union of Onions | Registered: Jul 2000
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Barrierd
I have a colony of shrimp living in my bladder
Member # 3132
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posted 04-19-2003 08:29 PM
Um, does "thy" and "thou" really have anything to do with "theos"?
I mean, seeing as one is Greek and one is Old-English...
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Where are my bitches
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