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Author Topic: So there's this girl...
FireBlast
Farting Nudist
Member # 2466

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posted 03-02-2003 03:26 AM      Profile for FireBlast   Author's Homepage   Email FireBlast   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Well, she goes to my class and first off let me start by saying that she is the hottest girl I have ever met, for real. Anyway, for the last couple of months we've been talking on the phone everyday for about an hour and we even went to catch a movie a few times, but I always thought of us as just friends. Recently though, I've started realizing that I have serious feelings for her because, looks aside, she is one of the smartest most interesting people I know. There's only one problem...

She smokes like a chimney...

Now, I'm not one of those people who have a problem with idiots who smoke, just don't do it next to me cause it disgusts the living shit outa me. Seriously, up until I met her I never even wanted to be around people who smoke but when I'm with her I can somehow stand it. We talk about it a lot and she really does want to quit, which is the most disturbing part of all. Almost every week she tries to but the most she ever lasted so far was four days, and usually she breaks within 1-2 days. Now this is ok for me since everytime she starts smoking again she comes to me and gives me a huge hug and about a million kisses because she knows she dissapointed me, but while that feels great I really would like to see her stop smoking since it's such a disgusting habit. I would have asked her to be my girlfriend if it wasn't for that... I seriously have no idea what to do.

Also, I have no idea why I'm posting this here since I hardly ever post at all and the best I could hope for are some tl;dr replies or whatever hip internet slang you guys use these days. But if someone has a serious opinion and/or expreience with such a subject I would very much like to hear him out.

From: israel | Registered: Dec 2001  |  IP: Logged
Anthrax
Ultimate Authoritative Power in the Universe
Member # 335

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posted 03-02-2003 03:37 AM      Profile for Anthrax   Author's Homepage   Email Anthrax   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Get over it. She has to quit on her own, you can't stop her.

Also don't dump her or anything just because she smokes. I'd have to laugh at you if you did that.

From: Somebody put shit in my pants! | Registered: Apr 2000  |  IP: Logged
cfalcon
OLDNBLD
Member # 19

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posted 03-02-2003 03:44 AM      Profile for cfalcon   Email cfalcon   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Ok, I find smoking so absurdly unsexy as to be embarrassing. I would never want to date or marry a smoker.

However-

You're already stuck, buddy. You already want her. Just fucking date her and don't worry about the smoking thing. If you are (a) dating her in three years AND (b) she still smokes, then you can start worrying.

From: 39°45' N, 104°52' W | Registered: Feb 2000  |  IP: Logged
FireBlast
Farting Nudist
Member # 2466

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posted 03-02-2003 03:47 AM      Profile for FireBlast   Author's Homepage   Email FireBlast   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Yeah, but other than the fact that it's really unhealthy for both her and me (when I'm around her), there's the slight problem that kissing a girl who smokes is like wrapping your tongue around a furnace.

Also, wrapping my tongue around a furnace is not something I wish to do.

From: israel | Registered: Dec 2001  |  IP: Logged
Anthrax
Ultimate Authoritative Power in the Universe
Member # 335

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posted 03-02-2003 03:59 AM      Profile for Anthrax   Author's Homepage   Email Anthrax   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
You're not gonna get emphesyma from hanging around with this girl for a few hours a week.
From: Somebody put shit in my pants! | Registered: Apr 2000  |  IP: Logged
Ikuse
Farting Nudist
Member # 3037

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posted 03-02-2003 04:48 AM      Profile for Ikuse   Author's Homepage   Email Ikuse   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Bone her! Bone her all day long! That's what I'd do, anyways.

I'd bone that shit til it was raw and sore.

From: In my pants. | Registered: Aug 2002  |  IP: Logged
Psybro
Half Psyduck. Half Slowbro. All cop.
Member # 290

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posted 03-02-2003 10:09 AM      Profile for Psybro   Email Psybro   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Tell her that if she carries on smoking you'll beat her like the whore that she is.

Hopefully this will both stop her smoking, and turn her on.

From: Sheffield, South Yorkshire, UK | Registered: Apr 2000  |  IP: Logged
maagisk
Farting Nudist
Member # 536

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posted 03-02-2003 10:33 AM      Profile for maagisk   Author's Homepage   Email maagisk   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
You wouldn't belive how nasty it is kissing a girl that smokes, I ended up stuffing my jaws with breath mints.

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From: Dramen, Norway | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged
Mick_Hale
Total Moron
Member # 419

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posted 03-02-2003 10:40 AM      Profile for Mick_Hale   Email Mick_Hale   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
I dated a smoker once. She was my first girlfriend. I didn't know she smoked. If I knew, I would have dumped her before she cheated on me, multiple times.

I tend to try and not make friends with smokers. I'm a bit of an elitist schmuck that way. I try to hang around people with brains, and those that smoke (to me at least) are lacking brains. My second girlfriend stopped smoking after I told her I'd never kiss her again. She hasn't smoked since, and in fact she hates the stench of smoke, but we broke up several months later and we're still pretty good friends.

I doubt I'd ever date a smoker again, and my friends that do smoke are well aware of how adamantly against smoking I am. If you want her to quit, use the "I'm not gonna kiss you" method. It generally works quite well, especially if she really digs you. If she's serious about quitting, then help her along. Being an asshole and telling her that she reeks of tobacco may work quite well. Just my two cents on the issue. Good luck.

From: Thornhill, Ontario, Canada | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged
Boodabonzi
like a virgin
Member # 2958

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posted 03-02-2003 11:33 AM      Profile for Boodabonzi   Email Boodabonzi   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Psybro:
Tell her that if she carries on smoking you'll beat her like the whore that she is.

Hopefully this will both stop her smoking, and turn her on.

not everyone's mormon you know

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OK, I know I'm probably not the nicest Pokemon Trainer when it comes to giving advice, and if I get flamed on this, it is probably well deserved. So here goes...

From: Hitchin - biggest little shanty town in all of England | Registered: Jul 2002  |  IP: Logged
Badcrow
Cute Fluffy Squirrel
Member # 684

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posted 03-02-2003 01:02 PM      Profile for Badcrow     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Whip your cock out, bitches dig that shit.
Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged
Cesar
Farting Nudist
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posted 03-02-2003 01:26 PM      Profile for Cesar   Email Cesar   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
I have a few friends which smoke. Only one is a real heavy smoker. He isn't a chimney or a furnace, the man is a bloody tabbaco plant. He smokes more then what stores can stock up on.

Now that I think about it, after he offered me some, he really isn't much of a 'friend'.

Back to your situation:
I was read an article on the newspaper a year or two ago about a woman who was heavy smoker and wanted to quit. Her solution was to buy the cheapest smokes money can buy and smoked, constantly. Eventually the woman got so sick, she stopped.

I wouldn't recommend it, by now I willing to bet she died of every cancer smoking comes with.

But your friend is making progress, at least she's trying which is good enough. Eventually she'll stop, and if not, there is always shock therpy.

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"Hey, if AH decides to go for a site upgrade, I'm available as a dependable worker drone/slave taskmaster. I supply my own whip."- Uiru

From: Toronto, Canada | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged
Dweedle
My hands and feet are mangos
Member # 1209

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posted 03-02-2003 01:56 PM      Profile for Dweedle   Email Dweedle   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Mick_Hale:
I dated a smoker once. She was my first girlfriend. I didn't know she smoked. If I knew, I would have dumped her before she cheated on me, multiple times.

lol double whammy

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the only way to get pass this will be to commit suicune

From: second of all, Quagmire's not really a bad guy! | Registered: Nov 2000  |  IP: Logged
SDShamshel
Farting Nudist
Member # 791

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posted 03-02-2003 02:24 PM      Profile for SDShamshel   Email SDShamshel   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
You named yourself after a Pokemon attack and are asking for advice on a Pokemon messageboard.

Think about that.

From: Tokyo-3 | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged
Rolken
Vulcan
Member # 7

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posted 03-02-2003 03:45 PM      Profile for Rolken   Author's Homepage   Email Rolken   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by cfalcon:
Ok, I find smoking so absurdly unsexy as to be embarrassing. I would never want to date or marry a smoker.

If she's serious about it, why doesn't she go the patch route or something along those lines? Complications?

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[insert sig here]

From: Provo, UT | Registered: Feb 2000  |  IP: Logged
starCaliber
is evil and also MewtwoSama
Member # 268

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posted 03-02-2003 03:51 PM      Profile for starCaliber   Email starCaliber   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
this thread is excellent.

cfalcon: Just fucking date her and don't worry about the smoking thing. If you are (a) dating her in three years AND (b) she still smokes, then you can start worrying.

quite possibly the most easy to execute piece of advice ever given out in the history of this forum.

From: San Francisco, CA | Registered: Apr 2000  |  IP: Logged
ReturnofNumeroUno
Farting Nudist
Member # 476

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posted 03-02-2003 07:32 PM      Profile for ReturnofNumeroUno   Email ReturnofNumeroUno   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Don't worry, you've got a good 40 years to spend with her before she gets cancer.

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Ich Liebe NintendoLover

From: Pembroke Pines Florida | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged
Ancient Egyptian Cat-Gonk
Happy Good Times Fortune Happiness Happity Hocks Cat-Gonk Happifier
Member # 14

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posted 03-03-2003 03:50 AM      Profile for Ancient Egyptian Cat-Gonk   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Badcrow:
Whip your cock out, bitches dig that shit.

whip that shit out
no doubt about it
caused an earthquake and a power outage

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http://www.livejournal.com/users/jetblackvalias

From: Perth, Western Australia. | Registered: Feb 2000  |  IP: Logged
FireBlast
Farting Nudist
Member # 2466

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posted 03-03-2003 03:00 PM      Profile for FireBlast   Author's Homepage   Email FireBlast   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Some of you tend to look at the health issues as if they were everything like saying that "I won't get emphysema from being around her a few hours" or that "I have 40 years with her before she gets cancer" and neglect the fact that it completely grosses me out.

I doubt that saying "I won't kiss you if you smoke" would work... Everytime she tries to quit and doesn't manage she gets so depressed and self-hating, which makes me think that it's not voluntary and that she just gets dragged right in. She's been smoking for 3-4 years now so it's hard for her to just quit cold-turkey. I'm considering buying her patches or some shit... I hope it's not too expensive though, I don't have any money.
You need to understand, it's not like she smokes when she's around me... But we're just friends now so it doesn't matter. If we begin a relationship or something then I'll have to be around her more, plus I'll have to kiss her which I already did once or twice and believe me, it wasn't pretty.

From: israel | Registered: Dec 2001  |  IP: Logged
starCaliber
is evil and also MewtwoSama
Member # 268

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posted 03-03-2003 03:10 PM      Profile for starCaliber   Email starCaliber   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
FireBlast: plus I'll have to kiss her

oh you poor fuckin baby.

honestly...wtf...wtF. christ, kids.

From: San Francisco, CA | Registered: Apr 2000  |  IP: Logged
FireBlast
Farting Nudist
Member # 2466

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posted 03-03-2003 03:12 PM      Profile for FireBlast   Author's Homepage   Email FireBlast   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
lol, I think it was pretty much explained that kissing girls who smoke sucks, right? Did you miss that?
From: israel | Registered: Dec 2001  |  IP: Logged
Dweedle
My hands and feet are mangos
Member # 1209

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posted 03-03-2003 03:44 PM      Profile for Dweedle   Email Dweedle   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Nicorette

the patch

etc.

[ 03-03-2003, 03:45 PM: Message edited by: Dweedle ]

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the only way to get pass this will be to commit suicune

From: second of all, Quagmire's not really a bad guy! | Registered: Nov 2000  |  IP: Logged
Cloud9x
Estelle Getty
Member # 2805

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posted 03-03-2003 04:08 PM      Profile for Cloud9x   Author's Homepage   Email Cloud9x   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
pics plz

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[22:51] Y2Jesus: shut up japanese peopre

From: Kanadia eh? | Registered: Apr 2002  |  IP: Logged
Slade_64
chipmunk pr0n author
Member # 804

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posted 03-03-2003 04:56 PM      Profile for Slade_64   Email Slade_64   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
preferably scanned boobies plz

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Bucket.

From: Funky Town Texas | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged
cfalcon
OLDNBLD
Member # 19

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posted 03-03-2003 04:59 PM      Profile for cfalcon   Email cfalcon   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
oh you poor fuckin baby.

Imma have to give sC the nod here: I think that in 5-20 years you'll think you were a stupid kid if you don't at least try.

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Subject: Ninja and Opensource

From: 39°45' N, 104°52' W | Registered: Feb 2000  |  IP: Logged
ceoalex316
Time for the flaming leprosy party
Member # 338

posted 03-03-2003 05:03 PM      Profile for ceoalex316     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
cfalcon: Just fucking date her and don't worry about the smoking thing. If you are (a) dating her in three years AND (b) she still smokes, then you can start worrying.

True. Smokers don't get ugly or yellow teeth till they get in their 30's. Teen smokers only have bad breath. Though some people look sex while smoking a cigarette. Nothing to worry about now, even if you plan to make this thing last don't worry about it now. Worry about it later.

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Maximum Penetration Industries.

From: NYC | Registered: Apr 2000  |  IP: Logged
Face
I invented cancer.
Member # 1916

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posted 03-04-2003 10:15 AM      Profile for Face   Author's Homepage   Email Face   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Se><0r her up.

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Weezing!

From: Hackensack, nj | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged
Badcrow
Cute Fluffy Squirrel
Member # 684

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posted 03-04-2003 11:14 AM      Profile for Badcrow     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Your cock won't realize she's got bad breath.
Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged
Fractyl
Farting Nudist
Member # 1311

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posted 03-04-2003 02:27 PM      Profile for Fractyl     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Badcrow:
Your cock won't realize she's got bad breath.

tar stains

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I pretty much agree with Fractyl. -- Porygone

From: Wetlands of Langley B.C. | Registered: Dec 2000  |  IP: Logged
Badcrow
Cute Fluffy Squirrel
Member # 684

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posted 03-04-2003 02:36 PM      Profile for Badcrow     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Only if she's smoking while sucking.
Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged
Donald
Bob the Builder
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posted 03-04-2003 08:31 PM      Profile for Donald   Email Donald      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Smoking during any sexual act = wrong, and a SERIOUS turn-off.

Though after it... [Razz]

From: In your girl's panties | Registered: Feb 2001  |  IP: Logged
Badcrow
Cute Fluffy Squirrel
Member # 684

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posted 03-04-2003 09:22 PM      Profile for Badcrow     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Why are pubes curly instead of straight? If they were straight they'd poke her eyes out.
Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged
Manuel Calavera
Sock Lover
Member # 1202

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posted 03-06-2003 05:23 PM      Profile for Manuel Calavera     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Badcrow:
Why are pubes curly instead of straight? If they were straight they'd poke her eyes out.

Because they're (almost always) underneath clothing. And as an experiment, see what your partner thinks if you have dreadlocked pubes.

quote:
Originally posted by Donald:
Smoking during any sexual act = wrong, and a SERIOUS turn-off.

Though after it... [Razz]

What if it's one of those tricks where she puts it in her ear and it comes out her fadge?

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Gates is the Saddam Hussein of the consumer technology world. ~ Mr.K

From: Newcastle, Home of Geordies, Brown Ale and The Wildhearts | Registered: Nov 2000  |  IP: Logged
FireBlast
Farting Nudist
Member # 2466

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posted 03-06-2003 05:26 PM      Profile for FireBlast   Author's Homepage   Email FireBlast   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
This is the best day ever. Jesus, I swear... Sometimes I'm just so fucking lucky...

So we both rented Minority Report on DVD and went to my house (which was empty) and began watching it. We sit really close to eachother and my arms are around her, but all in a very friendly fashion because she stated earlier that she was cold.

So about 20 minutes after the movie started she puts her mouth next to my ear and begins whisperring something like this: "I'm tired of waiting. What are you scared of me or something? I want to be your girlfriend." And I'm like "OMG" inside my head but I manage to pull myself together and say: "yeah sure. I've been wanting to be your boyfriend for a while now but I don't know how I feel about your constant smoking. We'll need to work on that." So she's like "yeah whatever" and we spend the rest of the movie sucking eachother's faces like there's no tomorrow.

And this is where it gets good. Really good. Before she left we made some sort of an agreement. it was her suggestion, I wouldn't have never thought of it myself. Every time she smokes I get to do whatever I want with her for 15 minutes. Whatever I want.

Man, this is the best day ever.

[ 03-06-2003, 05:29 PM: Message edited by: FireBlast ]

From: israel | Registered: Dec 2001  |  IP: Logged
Manuel Calavera
Sock Lover
Member # 1202

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posted 03-06-2003 05:32 PM      Profile for Manuel Calavera     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by FireBlast:
Every time she smokes I get to do whatever I want with her for 15 minutes. Whatever I want.

Get that crazy whore some shares in Marlboro.

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Gates is the Saddam Hussein of the consumer technology world. ~ Mr.K

From: Newcastle, Home of Geordies, Brown Ale and The Wildhearts | Registered: Nov 2000  |  IP: Logged
Boodabonzi
like a virgin
Member # 2958

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posted 03-06-2003 06:09 PM      Profile for Boodabonzi   Email Boodabonzi   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Dude, by ''whatever you want'' she means ''whatever you want that involves buying me presents'' and not ''whatever you want that involves you invading my duodenum''. But I guess you could get lucky.

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OK, I know I'm probably not the nicest Pokemon Trainer when it comes to giving advice, and if I get flamed on this, it is probably well deserved. So here goes...

From: Hitchin - biggest little shanty town in all of England | Registered: Jul 2002  |  IP: Logged
MewtwoSama
Asshole
Member # 12

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posted 11-23-2015 07:59 PM      Profile for MewtwoSama   Author's Homepage   Email MewtwoSama   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
I told a friend I have feelings for her and she rejected me. [Trash Bear]
From: Abyss of Evil | Registered: Feb 2000  |  IP: Logged
Mr.E
Farting Nudist
Member # 696

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posted 12-07-2015 05:45 AM      Profile for Mr.E     Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
I've solved that problem by not having friends.

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MickHale18: nevermind, I'll pull out for a second
MickHale18: *pulls out finger*

From: Munchkin Land, Oz | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged
MewtwoSama
Asshole
Member # 12

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posted 12-28-2015 03:58 PM      Profile for MewtwoSama   Author's Homepage   Email MewtwoSama   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
It's been over a month and it still hurts.
From: Abyss of Evil | Registered: Feb 2000  |  IP: Logged
Mr. K
Racist
Member # 2

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posted 01-09-2016 03:51 AM      Profile for Mr. K   Author's Homepage   Email Mr. K   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
Did you explain to her that you're a Pokemon master?

We'll vouch for you.

Give us her phone number and we'll inundate her with tales of your pocket monster prowess.

From: Cinnabar Island | Registered: Feb 2000  |  IP: Logged
mr k mouth
Farting Nudist
Member # 802

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posted 08-18-2016 05:57 AM      Profile for mr k mouth   Author's Homepage   Email mr k mouth   Send New Private Message      Edit/Delete Post  Reply With Quote 
https://youtu.be/Ebdc7fOhyOY

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LP Elian: or, like.. when i was younger, i was hard .. like.. 25/7
LP Elian: i couldn't help it
LP Elian: like.. all elementary school, i had a hard-on

From: I OWN PORNBOT AT CS | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged


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